


All I Think About Is You

by xSukunas_Toy_Gojos_Bitchx



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-08
Updated: 2020-08-08
Packaged: 2021-03-07 08:15:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 26,560
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21714187
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xSukunas_Toy_Gojos_Bitchx/pseuds/xSukunas_Toy_Gojos_Bitchx
Summary: Kise has tried.  Tried all through high school and college to find the girl he ran into at the studio during a self proclaimed break in his photo shoot when he peeked in on her debut. Dressed in nothing but the most alluring lingerie, she embodied in her body language and style everything he wanted, everything he didn't know he was missing, and everything he tried to make every other girl.So what happens when he finds out her secrets after he sees her with another man?  Will he take her for himself or will he let her go forever and lose the one person he wanted AND the only person who loved him for who he truly is?---This story takes place when Kise and the OC are in their mid 20's after they have gone to college and started their careers.  It ties directly in with @xredxmoonx soon to launch KNB story as the two time lines happen in tandem and even overlap.
Relationships: Aomine Daiki & Kise Ryouta, Aomine Daiki & Kise Ryouta & Momoi Satsuki, Aomine Daiki/Kagami Taiga/Kise Ryouta, Aomine Daiki/Original Female Character(s), Kagami Taiga/Kise Ryouta, Kagami Taiga/Original Character(s), Kise Ryouta/Original Female Character(s)
Kudos: 1





	1. Lanterns In the Dark

"KISE RYŌTA! What in the ever living fuck!" His fiery step sister Kaiya screamed from the doorway of his luxurious penthouse apartment as she slammed the door. "Haven't I told you to keep your dick out of Ari's face when she's working! I don't care that you need your inseam adjusted to make your pants to Euro trend! AND GET YOUR HAND OFF THE TOP OF HER HEAD! SHE ISN'T ONE OF YOUR SIDE SHOW WHORES! On the last word she storms towards Kise causing him to step back and give the auburn stationed on her knees fractions away from his tightly briefed and bulging with such definition even Michelangelo couldn't depict its perfection this close in the same position, package some MUCH NEEDED breathing room. 

"How's she supposed to get an accurate measurement if she doesn't get up close and into the source!" He pouts before getting smacked on the lower back side of his head since Kai is a good five inches shorter than him.

"You need to start treating her like a woman and less like one of the boys or a sexless object! Do you even think about how being that close makes her feel?" Kai's steel grey glare could melt ice in the Arctic with it's intensity. 

Kise's eyes soften as his wide doe-eyed innocent look lands on Ari before blinking a few times and gracing us with his sparkling blameless smile. "I'm sure she would tell me Ki Ki if she was uncomfortable. Besides, it's her job. She's used to this."

With Kai's attention now focused on his use of her least favorite pet name, Kai jumps at him ready to kick his ass but Kise just plants her in place with the palm of his hand on her forehead as she pedals and flails like some child against a bully that's still dressed in nothing but his briefs. 

Rolling her eyes and standing, Ari begins to put away the tailoring kit and notes she kept on hand just for Kise. Though he wasn't her only client, he was her most special. Even after eight years together that spanned middle school and high school, they hadn't formed their "relationship" until shortly after Kise's dad married Kaiya's mom the first year of High School. 

Like some grossly cliche love story, Kise had strolled into Top, her dad's luxury clothing and tailoring line for wealthy men and women, with his manager on the recommendation of his label looking for clothes for the wedding. At that point Aria had no idea that he would be her dad's client as they were all booked under false names, but that bastard knew she had THE WORST crush on Kise so he had made sure Ari was free to assist him as soon as Ryō, as dad called him, entered.

Despite knowing who Kise was since Middle School, as they had gone to the same school year after year, there had never been a chance to officially meet until that day. Aria had always been shy as a young child, and groups her age made her uncomfortable. Unfortunately, her Dad, being an only parent after his wife's death, was adamant about making sure she had ordinary kid experiences, so a few days a week, she attended regular middle school in between helping him run his business and homeschooling her.

Once face to face with her crush, she turned ash white until her dad slapped her hard on the back, a sneaky smile crossing his lips as he handed the responsibility of fitting Ryō to her. Fortunately, her work persona was stronger than her shy high school one, so she recovered quickly and aloof but polite, started in on Kise's outfit.

From that moment on their "relationship" blossomed. Always friendly, she gave him solid but honest criticism about the fashion sense he clearly lacked. After several shoots using her suggestions she was hired on as his personal stylist and tailor. Sure she was young but if she had to put her money where her mouth was, she was sure her dad had something to do with it.

If she had only known what a long term pain in the ass...

"RI RIIIII!" Kise whined making Ari's eye twitch. "Ki Ki is being mean to me! Tell her to go away because we aren't done yet!" Then there was loud tousling as bodies tumbled over the back of the couch and onto the floor. 

Correction, PAINS in the ass. 

"You know damn well Kise you don't pay me enough to interject in sibling affairs. Besides, what's my number one rule?" Ari turns around and interlaces her fingers in front of her as she watches cheeks being pulled and elbows being deflected.

"Dun mhwiks werk wif pweasyr." He tries to sound out as drool falls from his lips due to Ari sticking her fingers in his mouth and expanding his cheeks on both sides.

"That's right. Now if you will excuse me, Mr. Ryōta, I must take my leave." Then she turns to grab her things as Kai releases Kise's face and glares at him sharply; both knowing THAT particular response means they had pissed Ari off.

"Put some damn clothes on you perv." Kai spat before getting up and following Ari out. There was no way she couldn't spend some time with the vexed auburn after that knowing how hard doing this job with him was for her seeing how much Ari loved Kise.

———

Not five steps from the door Ari's phone makes the final fantasy WARK sound signaling she has a message from Kise.

"Jesus he's a brat. Read the fucking room you tasteless prick." Kai says with irritation and concern in her voice.

Aria just sighs and taps the message notification on her screen

Ise

I'm sorry if I was out of line. You know you can tell me you are uncomfortable. I'm not trying to put you in that position I'm just so comfortable with you I don't even notice.

"Heh." Aria's laugh is sharp and bitter. "I know you don't, just like you don't notice that all I think about is you." Her voice is soft and directed inward but loud enough Kai doesn't miss a single word. 

"Ria, why don't you just tell him?" You can't keep it from him forever."

Aria pockets her phone as every few seconds a new WARK resounds. "I can't lose him completely. I doubt he would even want to be near me if he knew. Even if he did he wouldn't want me like this. He doesn't look at me like that and you know it. So why not just keep lying and enjoying what I have? It lets me be closer and more real with him than any of those gatcha mystery bitches he tries to fill his time with."

Kai just sighs heavily before reaching for her phone and tapping away. Within seconds of her first message sent, Ari's incoming messages stop and the fight continues via text between the greatest love of her life and the person she loved as a sister. 

What I wouldn't give for a fraction of the love I have for you to be shined back at me. Ari thinks to herself while the pair walks back home in silence and she looks out on the dusky sky that makes the street lights look like lanterns in the distance; the haunting melody of Andrew Leuce hummed softly under her breath.


	2. We’re Not Lovers We’re Just Strangers

Groaning slightly, Kise opened his eyes to slits and sat up.Looking to his left at the small alarm clock on the bedside table that read 3 A.M., he gives an exhausted sigh.Every time he and Ari fought or had a disagreement, he had the same dream. 

He was in the studio doing a shoot for AX's new line when he snuck out on an unsanctioned break. Wanting to get as far away as possible while the photographer was reviewing images, he wandered down a hall he had never been in. Since his agency and in house photographers were located in a prominent business complex, several other agencies and businesses shared space and resources in one place. 

Not wanting to draw any unnecessary attention, he usually slunk past any open doors he found, but something about the excitement resounding from Studio 10-C sparked his curiosity, not to mention the familiar name dropping.

"I doubt Mr. Tetsuki would send us something not worth seeing. Especially since it's something, he has a direct investment in." A deep male voice spoke with assurance.

"That's true. This is, however, completely out of his realm of expertise. How would he even know what's fashionable in this case?" A very skeptical female interjected.

"Talent is talent, though, and his opinion has garnered quite the equitable following." The first man shot back impartially.

At the mention of Ari's dad, Kise perked up and stopped, creeping toward the frame of the door to listen in. Once the conversation turned to someone questioning the credibility of a person he highly respected, he felt the need to step in. As he went to step inside, however, he was frozen in his tracks. 

From a room on the left side, a woman close in height to himself with long milk chocolate-colored hair done up in Victorian curls, and smooth features with just enough definition to create a slender, demure visage, walked in with a sultry sway into the room. Though not slim, she was thin with clean lines and attractive musculature that drew his eyes as they traveled down her body hidden by a black silk robe.

A robe that seconds later revealed the most erotically bound curves he had ever seen. As she undid and dropped the fabric, crossing her legs so the ankles of each opposite leg aligned diagonally, he ducked behind a pillar as he peaked at an angle at the scantily clad woman in front of him. 

Dressed in a crimson red babydoll with black embroidery and lace, it's back was tied with a black silk ribbon bow at her lower back. As his eyes follow the natural curve of her hips, he notices the seam huges her supple flesh in a French cut panty line that accentuated their sumptuous curve. Despite not being able to see the front, he knew if he had, he would lose himself like some stalker perv right there. 

That's where the dream and his relationship with her always ended. Not long after, he heard his team calling him, and he was forced to flee the scene in order not to create more drama. When he attempted to make contact after that, the only thing he learned was the woman went by the name of Solar, and she was an up and coming model for her fashion line as well as adult photography.

From that day on, he started looking up porn when no one was looking for a woman that went by the name Solar, but the only thing that came up was a single online storefront for woman's intimates that went by the same name. Though he never gave up on finding her, he never saw her again at the studio. The only place her images showed were on Buxomz paid site for fans labeled high rollers under the paid to play tab or in his free subscription to Men's Monthly which always posted spreads of her in high-class women's intimates every time a new collection or piece launched for the storefront of the same name. 

Grunting in frustration, he got out of bed and went to the fridge for a drink. Upon opening it up, he did a quick scan before closing the door again, making a mental note to go to the store tomorrow. Moving to the sink before reaching into the cabinet above and grabbing a glass, he filled it halfway from the faucet before shutting off the water. Bringing the glass to his lips, he polished its contents off quickly and placed the glass in the sink.

Grateful the dream hadn't happened when a girl had been over, he walked out to the balcony and stared out at the bustling city below. The few times a girl had been over had been awkward and not because he had woken anyone up and had to explain what woke him up. He had learned very early, and entirely by accident, in High School that the only thing that ever let him get back to sleep when he was restless was talking to Ari. That meant he either had to explain Ari and deal with a dramatic and stupid ultimatum or not sleep. 

It wasn't until one night after a fight with his dad shortly after the marriage that these "after-hours services and charges" came into play. Having gone over to a friend's house to cool off, he had meant to text Kai but instead had hit the wrong person, forgetting the last person he talked to was Ari regarding the things he needed for the next shoot. 

"You realize what time it is, don't you?" Ari had replied after a few seconds.

Being far too cocky at that age, he had replied with more balls than he had. "If I remember correctly, you are supposed to be available at all hours, or is that not your father's motto?"

Too much of a shit to realize the implications of THAT particular jab, he got an ellipsis as a response before she replied sharply, "If you were half the man my father was you would understand proper business etiquette, but since you aren't and have none I will make this one exception. What is it you need, Mr. Ryōta?" That was how the degrees of her anger had begun to be gauged. 

For the next two weeks, she took her anger out on him. Despite being an incredibly excellent and rational ear at the time, she made her rage regarding his rudeness known in little ways. Accidentally stabbing his sensitive flesh with pins, pretending she hadn't ordered the things he needed for a shoot only to have it already at the studio waiting, and even threatening him if he didn't go on torturous dates with some of his meeker stalkers because it "built the character he lacked."

Thinking back, he realized he had never asked her why she responded this late or why she had been up to if she even had been. The exchanges had always been so natural that it never occurred to him. Being friends with her, in general, had always been that way. Smiling, he tapped at his phone before his restless heart reached out along the digital lifestream.

Ise

What are you wearing?

The first night he had texted her that wasn't related to dreams. He was up late trying to sort out his wardrobe for the last minute shoot he had been sent info for and wanted to know if she was decent enough to come over and help.

Ri Ri

My heart on my sleeve? You?

He hadn't known what to say, so he just sent a confused emoji with a question mark.

Ri Ri

Just forget it. What's up?

Explaining his dilemma, she had come over and promptly passed out on his couch two hours later when they had finished. As he covered her up with a blanket, he thought how grateful he was that she was always there to help. 

Jogging his mind back to the present, her quick response already began to ease him.

Ri Ri

The same thing as you.

Being very intuitive, she had picked up quickly that any text after 1 AM involved a girl, and nine times out of ten, that girl was the one in his dream he had told her about the very next day it happened leading to a few days of VERY awkward interactions from between them. That meant her answer had layers, layers Kise was too dense and self-absorbed to grasp. None the less, the response had put him at ease in a way nothing else could.

Ise

Do you ever sleep?

Ri Ri

Beauty sleep is overrated. Well, not for you, it isn't. I've seen you on no sleep. 

Ise smiled and leaned on the railing of his balcony.

Ise

Well, if you just moved in with me like I asked and became my secretary... then he made the tongue out emoji

Ri Ri

That would ruin my goal to live a drama-free life, you Queen.

Running his thumb affectionately on the rim of his phone, his eyes lift to stare at the horizon filled with twinkling city lights. No one knows him better than her.

The light from his phone pulls him back as a final message comes through.

Ri Ri

Go to bed. Your beauty is your only asset, and I don't wanna listen to you bitch when it fails and costs you that nice ass of yours. 

With lazy eyes, Kise yawned. It was remarkable how she always knew just what to say to put him at ease. If he thought about it, he would have realized her brutal honesty and blatant disregard for his fame was the salve he needed to withstand the falsity that threatened to overwhelm him. Having taken off after going to modeling school straight out of High School, he had found the duplicity and pretenses more than he could withstand being more immature than most his age. 

Fortunately, Ari had stood by him the whole way. Going for a fashion degree at the same school, they spent almost every moment together when he wasn't in class or at work. She even staid in his dorm room since he was popular enough to be granted private living quarters, which was also how she learned living with him could assuredly kill her.

Pressing the buttons to his phone, he sent his reply.

Ise

Even if I did, you would still love me. <3

Ri Ri

Are you sure about that? Ask me when that happens, you reckless pain in my ass. 

Ise

I know you will. Thanks, Ria. Night.

Ri Ri

Night Casanova

Yawning again, he strolled inside and crawled in bed as ten minutes down the road; a heart shattered as tears fell on the pages of a dream that only came to fruition in someone else's bedroom.


	3. Definition of Insanity

They say the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.Looking in the mirror the next morning, Ari knew if that was true, she didn't have a sane bone in her body.She also didn't have a prayer.

Every night Kise called her or texted her after having that dream, that dream where he described in detail a woman she could never be for him, her heart broke into uncountable pieces.What was it about her he found so captivating?He hadn't talked to her and had only seen her from the back, so there was no way he should feel the way he did about her? Chuckling derisively, she came to the same conclusion.Guess they were both insane.Misery always did love the company.

Having spent the night in the workshop working on last-minute designs, she starred in the small mirror of her studio apartment at the back of her dad's business as she brushed her breast length, pin-straight Auburn hair, checking the roots to make sure she didn't need to dye them soon. Holding the brush to her chest, she thought back to the day she had first colored it in high school.She had been panicked Kise would notice and ask her a bunch of questions.Fortunately, he was so wrapped up in trying to hide his mystery girl infatuation from his current partner he didn't even look at her for more than two seconds to notice. It wouldn't be until almost a month later that Kise would touch her hair and comment on how pretty the color was. 

Since then, she had continued to dye it despite the many protests she got from Kai about living a lie and having a little more faith. 

To her, though, a lie was a small price to pay in comparison to potentially losing the one thing she had that no one other than Kai had; Kise's unwavering trust.No matter how many girls he dated, the only one that every stuck around was her.She was the one he came to when he had a problem, she was the one he leaned on physically and emotionally, and she was the one who bailed him out time and time again.Why jeopardize that? In his way, as things stood, he loved her.Maybe it wasn't the way she wanted, but it was still a small victory. 

Sighing, she put the brush back as her phone began to ring. Glancing down as she went to grab her toothbrush and toothpaste, she was tempted not to answer it because she knew she would have to explain her foul mood.Standing there as it rang, she weighed the repercussions of having her heart emotionally dredged open again against the verbal tongue lashing she would get for ignoring the call and trying to shove her feelings deep down.

Prepping the brush, she answered the phone on its final ring. 

"I'm brushing my teeth." Then she promptly shoved the brush in her mouth and made sure elaborate brushing sounds ensued.

"When you are done, shove it up to your ass." The charming voice of Kai melodically sounded over the receiver before the call went dead. 

Guess Kise had gotten to her first and run his mouth about last night. Washing off the brush and spitting, Ari ran a gentle finger coated with rejuvenation cream under her eyes before exiting the bathroom, grabbing her coat and purse and jogging to the front she opened the door to a sour-faced Kai holding two cups of coffee, breakfast and the spare key to her studio as she went to open the door.

Like a rehearsed dance, the two stared at each other as Ari took one cup before Kai backed up, and Ari turned to lock the door.With her secrets locked, she turned back and faced Kai, whose stare hadn't faltered.As always, Ari took the first step next to Kai before the two walked off together to their respective destinations.

"I swear to God if you don't tell him I will." Kai's heartfelt but empty threat broke the silence.

"I know you will." Ari took a sip of her coffee, welcoming the burn her tongue would feel since the best way to stop thinking about something that hurt was to hurt something else.

"Speaking of pains in the ass, hows your assimilation of Kise's copycat technique going?" Never one to pull punches, Ari braced for the elbow to the gut she knew she would receive without fail. Groaning as the elbow dug deep, she pushed back harder. "I'm just saying dating a different guy all the time because you are holding out for the one you still want seems a lot like you are copying his life depicted in relationships."

"Hi, pot, I'm kettle. Say, which one of us do you think is blacker?" Kai's cracklings cynicism not lost on either female. 

"Least I'm not trying to fill my void with every single guy who's even remotely attractive or carries a trait similar to his just so I can relive how he slammed my lockers as he ran up and down my hall."

That's when Kai turned and glared at Ari before yelling, "That's because I'm not a pussy who hides behind a veil of lace just because my virgin sensibilities can't make the first move and own my sexuality!"

For a moment, the two stand there and glare before a truck horn sounds, and they are snapped back to reality, which places them on the sidewalk by Kai's school, where students are starting to line up for the days lessons. 

Awkwardly laughing, the two women hug. 

"It's not like he's ever coming back anyway.So what does it matter if I enjoy the life I have?" Kai's voice was deflated and pained.

"There is a difference between masochism and self-flagellation.Though neither one ends happy, the intent is different. I wish it were enough that Satsuki and I love you and want to see you happy.What you are doing now doesn't make you happy.It doesn't even fill the void."

"It is enough, I just..."

Then the bell rang, and the moment of potential clarity faded.

"Shit.You coming home tonight?" Kai asked before dumping her empties in a nearby can.

"I hope so.That back room apartment isn't comfortable."

"Alright, see you then!"

Then Kai was off again running towards the only dream that kept her heart connected to the only thing she had ever lost and refused to admit she regretted.

Guess that makes us all insane.


	4. Things Better Left Unsaid

At this point, Aria really shouldn't have been surprised that Kai wasn't home when she got there. She had begun suspecting a long time ago that she asked because she wanted to know if she needed to leave to avoid Ari's 'Eye of Sauron' as Kai called it since she seemed to know everything and had no qualms passing judgment on what she knew. Amazingly Satsuki wasn't there either. Guess she had a late-night planned as well. 

Heading to her room, she placed down her stuff and began changing into something more comfortable. Grabbing a tank and oversized sweater she had appropriated from Kise when he left it at the studio during a shoot, she threw on a pair of leggings and tied up her hair in a messy bun before heading to the bathroom to remove her contacts. With her life settled and her brain shifting into comfort mode, she went into the living room. With every intent on frying her mind with some pointless Netflix nonsense that didn't make her think of how her desire for Kise crawled over her skin like an incurable disease, she went directly to the couch to sit down.

The moment her butt hit the cushion 'Don't Stop Believing' blared from her phone, signaling the cause of her emotional misfortune was calling. Groaning at having to get back up and go to her room, she trudged like a zombie, picking it up at the last moment before it went to voicemail. 

"Yes, Kise, what is it?" Her tone flat and tired.

"I'm bored. Come over and hang out with me."

"Don't you have someone else to go out with?" She wasn't in a space to dredge through her emotions again. 

"I have an early day tomorrow and don't want to deal with the inconvenience of throwing someone out tonight."

"So, you would rather inconvenience me?"

"RIIII RIIII don't say that! You weren't doing anything, were you?"

Grinding her teeth, she snapped back, "What if I was!"

"Well, I checked your location before calling as you asked me to do the last time I 'barged in on your plans' and it says you are at home. That means all you were doing was watching T.V. since my sister isn't there running her mouth, and Satsuki isn't scolding her."

Growling behind closed lips, "That doesn't mean I want to come over!"

"If you don't come over, I will just come to youuuuuuu!"

Rolling her eyes and sighing heavily, she gets up. "FINE!" Then he hangs up the phone.

Ten minutes later, she knocks on Kise's door. Being stupidly loaded from modeling, the door clicks open, and his chipper voice comes over the intercom outside his door. "Come in!"

Entering, she places her bag in the usual cubby by the door before taking her slippers off and walking inside. By the time she is at the living room couch, he has rounded the corner wearing a faded pair of loose jeans that hang just at his pelvic bone, a tight charcoal men's thermal long sleeve crew neck shirt, and socks. When their eyes lock briefly, Ari sees a surprise in his eyes before he shuffles up and pinches her cheeks. 

"Awwwww Ari, you look so cute! I didn't know you wore glasses! And that sweater looks better on you than it ever did on me!" Then he flashes his cheesiest grin.

Blushing, Ari pushes him away and sits down on the couch. "There's a lot you don't know, so shut up idiot and sit down so we can get this over with."

Laughing through closed lips, Kise sits down before reaching over and stealing her glasses. "Let's see what you look like without glasses. Do you wear contacts? Are they colored?" 

Holding her glasses behind him out of her reach, Ari turns around and grabs for them. "Give those back, Kise they are my only pair!"

"Answer my questions, and I will give them back." He teases.

"Damnit, Kise!" Then she reaches one last time but loses her balance and ends up straddling him to recover. With her hips over his and her breasts in his face, she glances down to an image; her heart wasn't prepared to handle. Though not touching, his face is inches from her breasts, and he is still managing to hold her glasses out of her reach behind him. Blushing profusely, she makes one last grab that he consents to, allowing her to grab her drinks and put them on before adjusting her hands so she can return to her seat. Looking down one last time to give him a piece of her mind, their eyes lock, and an awkward silence permeates the air as he looks questioningly at her beat red face. 

Before he can inquire, his phone rings, and she takes the opportunity to scramble off of him. With her butt firmly planted in her seat, he glances at his phone and whistles before getting up and walking out onto the balcony. Watching him curiously with a pang of jealousy that he would hide anything from her, she does the best she can to listen from her vantage point.

By the way, he talks it is someone he is very interested in hearing from. His face is brighter, carrying a challenging smile she only ever saw on the court. His body remains open; he doesn't hunch over or scrunches his face. He licks his lips like a predator before making some snide comment she can't hear. Between barked laughs and unseen posturing, his face suddenly gets serious. Though he doesn't yell, his mouth tightens, his eyes narrow and become sharp, and he grits his teeth. Then with a curt response, he hangs up and stares at his phone before looking back at Ari's concerned face. Smiling the smile he only gives when he's about to lie, she squints her eyes as he enters.

"Don't feed me bullshit. Does it affect your work?"

"Of course not." He is still smiling.

"Is there something I should know?"

"What makes you think that." Distressed smiling.

"Kise Ryota, if you continue to lie to me…"

"All right, All right!" His hands go up in front of him. "Will you accept that it was an old friend that just called me out of the blue?"

Ari raises an eyebrow and crosses her arms over her chest as she leans back into the couch.

"Riiiiight. Well, that isn't a lie." He rubs the back of his head with his hand as he tries to smile his way out of her skepticism.

She continues to stare at him, nonplussed. 

Sighing, he caves dejectedly. "I know I ask a lot, Ari, and I know I'm high maintenance." Then he looks at her with complete seriousness. "I'm asking you to trust me the way I trust you. If something happens, I will tell you, but it's better if we keep this as a one-off."

Staring a few more seconds, she snuggles into the couch before staring at the T.V., "Then hurry the fuck up and sit down before I regret even the things that haven't happened yet."

Four hours and two movies later, Ari’s eyes are starting to sag as she caught herself nodding off. 

“Okay, Kise, time for me to go. Have a good day tomorrow.” She yawned and went to get up, but he grabbed her wrist. 

Looking back half asleep, she saw his wide doe eyes glisten with sadness, and she tried to steal her heart, but her level of tiredness prevented it from being successful.

“It’s late. Just stay here.”

Trying to pull her arm away, she frowned. “I don’t want to. I want to go home. I’ve slept two days in that shitty bed in dad’s stores. I don’t want to go through another night, losing sleep on a couch.”

Kise holds her tighter and becomes more insistent. “Then, I’ll sleep on the couch, and you can take the bed.” 

Looking at him curiously, Ari squints her eyes. “You are an idiot. You have an early day; you can’t sleep on the couch.” 

“Then come sleep in the bed with me like we used to do when we were in high school right before a big shoot.”

There was a profound moment of tension as Ari looked at him like he was crazy. “We aren’t kids anymore, Kise. That’s not going to work. Besides, I want my own space.” She tried pulling back, but he held firm. 

“Please, Ria.”

Her heart melted. He hadn’t called her that since they graduated high school. 

“Why is it so important I stay tonight? Does it have something to do with the call you received.”

Turning his face to the side, he set his lip and stared at the back of the couch, his grip unconsciously clenching and releasing as his face warred with some unknown demons he wasn't able to express.

Ari knew but chose not to press that it had something to do with the call. She also knew it wasn't like Kise to be this insistent. 

”Fine, Kise, I'll stay, bit just tonight.”

Turning.his face, his eyes alight with relief, he stood up and pulled her to the bedroom. Once inside, she began to lose her nerve. This wasn't how their first time in bed was supposed to go. If she got in now, all her hopes and dreams of their relationship just being a phase would get thrown out the door. Just as she went to back out, she turned to see Kise naked from the waist down and undoing his pants. 

”Jesus Kise.” she blushed and turned away.

He just looked at her curiously. ”What’s the big deal? You see me like this all the time.”

Not meeting his gaze as his pants drop to the floor, leaving him only in boxers, her voice becomes tense. That's for work. This isn't working. This is your intimate space, not to mention the place many of your dates end up.”

Walking to the bed, he lays down on his back. ”It’s hot what you think. Most of them are so drunk they pass out long before the mattress, and even if they make it there, they end up empty-handed anyway. I can never bring myself to sleep with them, not when they aren't what I want.”

Aria stands there dumbfounded. Did he hot sleep with them?

”I promise aim not lying to you, so come lay down.”

Slowly she does as he asks, rolling on her side to face him before closing her eyes. Unfortunately, Kise has a different agenda. Grabbing her firearms as they tuck against her chest, he pulls her against him tightly before pressing his cheek against the side of her head.

”Promise me something, Ria.” His voice carries a tinge of fear as he holds her gently but firmly.

”What is it?”

Squeezing her tightly, his voice remains insistent but calm. ”Promise no matter what you won't leave me.”

Breathing in deeply, she replies, ”Only if you promise the same.”

\-------

With Kise falling asleep quickly after getting into bed, Ari found herself at an impasse. Once they had gotten to college, she had made a point never to sleep with him like this again. He hadn’t given any pushback because he was so focused on modeling and his popularity. Though she was grateful he hadn’t put up a fight; she was also sad because it meant he didn’t harbor any of the feelings she had held onto up to that point. 

Still facing him because every time she tried to move, he whined in his sleep and squeezed her, she could only peek up at the gorgeous sleeping face of the man she loved endlessly. Nothing about him was unattractive. As her eyes washed over his features, she envisioned how he had changed since they were in high school. Biting her lip, she gave in and reached up to brush her hand across his cheek. 

Humming slightly with a sigh of contentment, he smiled slightly in his sleep; the tension is releasing from his eyes and face. 

“My beautiful and precious Kise.” She whispered ever so softly. 

Curling his head down slightly, she thought she saw a discoloration to his cheeks in the moonlight that lit the room via the sliding glass window that leads to the balcony.

Smiling, she kissed his forehead and cupped his cheek. “The things you do to me.”

It never occurred to her those heartfelt words would reach him and stir an emotional reaction. Without the range of mobility to prevent it, she found herself suddenly pulled into a less than innocent kiss as Kise lifted his head while his hands slid under her tank.

In shock at how soft and sweet his lips were as they pressed lovingly into hers, she was too distracted to process where his hands were as the left slid from her back, across her side and gently enveloped her right breast in its slender fingers embrace it before pinching the nipple between ring and index finger at the knuckle. 

“Kise!” She moaned and whined, her free hand digging into his shoulder as he, still asleep, rolled on top of her, kissed her, and then broke her heart. 

Moaning against her lips in a passionately primal voice, he whispered, “Solar, I love you.”


	5. Saying Goodbye To The Reality of Dreams

The devastating wave of loss washed over Ari as the word love left his lips so effortlessly and lovingly. Within seconds the tears began to pour from her eyes as painful, wracking sobs threatened to break through her body. Barely repressing them with gasping breaths, she covered her mouth with one hand as she tried to push Kise off with the other.

"Shhh, don't cry. I really do love you Sol…” That's when his eyes open to look at her distraught, teary-eyed face as his expressions of love quickly turned to surprise and then embarrassed mortification. "Ari?”

That look. That's the look she feared. That's the look she distanced herself from. That’s the look that prevented her from getting too close emotionally. That's the look that kept him at a distance, that told her to not call him by his first name, and that made her keep her deepest secrets to herself. That was also the look that would separate them forever.

Placing both hands on his shoulders, she pushed him quickly off now that he realized she wasn't the one he wanted to fuck. Tumbling out of bed, shaking, and half sobbing, she gathered her things and headed to the front door. When she was halfway there she heard him call her name and ask her to wait before a loud ’Fuck!’ resounded as he too scrambled into clothes.

His efforts were in vain. Driven by a pain that had no foreseeable end as each breath lacerated her heart deeper with an emotional blade of her own making, she threw open his front door and ran like a woman fleeing for her life.

And she was wasn't she? Fleeing for the last vestiges of sanity left to a mind now starved of its only reality. When she got to the street, she veered left instead of right, opting to take the kong way to dad's shop. Though she doubted she could sleep when she got there, she knew she couldn't handle going home. On the off chance that Kai was there, she knew she would have to explain everything while getting a lecture about finally telling him and getting it over with.

She had no concept of how long it took to get to the front door. All she knew was once inside with the door firmly locked behind her she finally felt safe. Walking to the back as the familiar smell of the only man who truly loved her for who she was filled her sore lungs, she began to calm enough to clean herself of her crippling regrets before lying down on the one-person bed.

Lying there in silence she knew she would never be the same. Though the kiss hadn't been meant for her, it had stolen what was left of her innocence regarding Kise. Never again would she see his face without the touch of his lips ghosting across her conscious as they had against her skin.

”Damn you, Kise.” She spoke quietly before curling into herself as she awaited the repercussions littered on tomorrow's horizon as Kai’s words resonated in her skull.

"Because the last thing you lose is hope.”

\-------

Having always had women chase after him, Kise Ryōta had never really had to try to understand the opposite sex. He also had never really wanted to. Not ready to settle down with A girl, he enjoyed the fruits the world bore for him in all things. Incredibly cocky about his looks and his basketball skills, he never really stopped to think that women wouldn’t really like him as he was. They liked him and that was all that mattered, right? But as his eyes had focused and the dream faded he was faced with a reality he wasn’t ready to handle.

His room had come into clarity in his mind first as the woman of his dreams lay underneath him. Intoxicated by the clean smell of her skin and sensual lushness of her breast, he allowed himself to bask in his arousal a second too long. As she cried out his name, it was like the first chime of the alarm demanding his attention. Something about that voice was wrong. Though he had never heard her speak, the tone of her ecstasy was too close to something tangible he didn’t want to venture towards.

As she began to cry, his mind took hold and drew him back to one of many scenes where he had taken her in a lust bound by his strongest irrational emotions. Emotions that wept from every pour as he worshiped her with every inch of himself. But like a voice calling as his soul descended into some unnamed hell, her tears tugged at parts of him that carried more timeless weight than the illusions his mind wished to provide.

Still, in disbelief, he told her gently not to cry and that he loved her but when his unconscious mind met head-on like a collision at ninety miles an hour with the infallible reality that lay before him, it was as if his core ripped from his body and lay battered underneath him. The tears no longer returned blind devotion. Instead, there was an unnamed terror mixed with overwhelming…regret?

Pixels had never come into focus so slow. Life had never bled so quickly. As the body beneath him shook and his horror at what he had done burst through, he became paralyzed with an all-consuming fear. As his mind shattered, the Mona Lisa on his mind turned into a live rendition of The Scream. Before he could do anything or his mind recover, she was out of bed and scrambling for her clothes in near hysteria. Next thing he knew she was halfway to the door and he was letting her leave.

Scrambling out of bed he tried to hop into pants as he called for her to wait but lost his balance and fell into the dresser.

”Fuck!” He yelled seconds before the front door opened and she was gone.

He wanted to chase her, wanted to apologize but the reality of what he did in his dream and this reality wasn't right. It had seemed so real, the touch of her skin, the curve of her waist, the way her hair cascaded down around the pillows…

Glancing back at a place both women had lain, he set his lips. Maybe it was just him but he felt like he as missing something. He had never had that dream with other girls present. Course he also hadn't talked to Aomine before bed either since he left.

Walking back to bed to sit on its edge he thought back to their conversation. Why was he asking about Kai? Why would he even care? He left her. Placing his hand on the space their bodies had been, he ran it gently over its surface. Ao had taken everything from Kai, leaving her a broken mess. Though Kise knew she still wasn't perfect, she had gotten better thanks to Satsuki and Ari. 

Gripping the sheets he clenched his jaw.

”He better not be thinking about coming back.”

If Aomine did, there was no telling the damage he would cause. He couldn't lose his sister again. He couldn’t lose anyone close to him. Aomine was ruthless with no shame and enjoyed using people when he wasn't doing things himself. There was no telling who he would go after once he was done with Kai.

Cursing himself that his insecurity had gotten the best of him and forced the one person he cherished the most beyond his sister to flee from him after he groped her, he brought his hand in front of his eyes and turned it over so he stared at its open palm. The palm that moments before had lovingly glided over the most perfect flesh he had ever laid hands on. Closing his eyes the images of Solar and Ari overlapped for a brief moment as unnamed arousal rose from deep within his core. Taking in a shuddered breath, his eyes shot open. There was no way he could see Ari like that. She was his rock, his sanity. He could never see her as a sexual object, but as his mind wandered and he lifted his eyes to stare at the empty door, his hand absentmindedly traced the curve of her back as it came to lay in his lap; the seeds of desire planted in her goodbye.


	6. All The Time

If it hadn't been for the fact that Kise had an early morning, she would have been woken up by him much earlier than Kai got to her. Regardless of who did it, the outcome was still far too aggressive.

"WAKE THE FUCK UP SO THAT DAMN LOVER BOY OF YOURS WILL LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE!" Kai yelled at Aria's sleeping form as she took her by the shoulders and shook her violently.

Groaning in protest and irritation, Ari's voice was grave. "He'll survive."

"Yeah, well, I won't, so why don't you check your damn messages and shut him the fuck up." Then dropping her unceremoniously, Kai stormed back the way she came. "I have to go back to work. I just came to make sure you weren't dead."

"Remind me to take back my spare key from you later," Ari grumbled before laying back down.

"Remind me to shove it up to your ass when you ask."

———

There hadn't been much point trying to go back to sleep. Once awake, it was a luxury her body never let her indulge in. Rolling onto her back, she grabbed her phone and opened it to fifteen missed calls and thirty texts. 

"Jesus Christ." Was all she said until she realized only two saying 'Where the fuck is you!' and 'Never fucking mind' had been from Kai before barging in.

The rest had been from Kise ranging from 'I'm sorry about last night I can explain' to 'Please Ria I don't care if you are mad and don't want to speak to me I need to know you are alright.'

Knowing Kai would relay the message that she was alive, she deleted the spam of texts and got up, grabbing her stuff before heading out. She wasn't ready to deal with how she felt about Kise or how the things he had done made her feel. Shuddering from a combination of arousal and denial, she decided the best place go was home. There were very few things a hot shower and a glass of wine didn't fix, at least on the surface. She also had a few hours before anyone got home so that it would give her a chance to at least position her façade of normalcy.

Today was one of those days she was grateful dad's shop was only open for appointments. With a strong online ready to wear business that he ran from the comfort of his home as well as his string of regular clients he made house calls to, the store was more for previewing collections and initial fit sessions. It also became her workspace for her lucrative hobby, as well.

So placing the key in the front door, she headed back towards the unknown just a tad worse for the wear.

———

As the hot water fell around her, Aria felt secure in knowing this moment would be the crowning achievement for the day. No matter how hard she tried, thoughts of Kise were everywhere. Even though ninety percent of them didn't start sexual, her mind stampeded towards the clitoris each time. It might have been different if he had just kissed her, but pinching her nipple with that full palm grab skyrocketed her level of horny instantaneously.

For example, there had been some kids eating ice cream on the bench next to the park down the street from the apartment. Her first thought was oh how sweet...which turned into her thinking of the time Kise had bought ice cream for them both and attempted to finish hers after finishing his...which made her think of an indirect kiss...which leads to the real kiss in bed...which bounced back to how Kise's lips would taste after eating ice cream...to how his lips would feel after eating ice cream and then capturing her nipple between those lips as the ice-cold mixed with the soft pink heat...and it was downhill from there.

But as the slightly below scalding water tattooed her skin with massaging droplets, courtesy of the massaging showerhead she had installed in her bathroom, she was able to find mental release from her demons since Kise didn't exist in this space. Smiling sadly, she thought of all the ways moving in with Kai, and Suki had changed her life. 

By nature of being siblings that existed better in their own space, especially after Aomine and Kai had broken up, Kise no longer came over to hang out with her. In cases where she was over him and his neediness, it was nice, but those days had become few and far between as she had admitted to being desperately in love with him. Unlike Kai, though, she hadn't filled the void left by Kise's lack of presence with other men that inadvertently made his presence even more prominent and wounding.

Kai had always teased her for that, wondering why, with her looks, she didn't get out there and get some. Ari had just shrugged and told her if it wasn't real, she didn't want it. To Ari, sex wasn't a bandaid you replaced with the new character of the moment every time the injury didn't heal.

Lifting her head, she turned before taking a deep breath and plunging her face under the relentless beads of water. Maybe if she burned her eyes enough, the image of him would be burned from her sight, and things could go back to the way they were. When her lungs started to burn from lack of air, she released the breath and gasped in the damp air.

Damnit. But she hadn't expected it to work. 

Shutting the water off, she wrung out her hair before pulling back the curtain and stepping out of the shower. As she walked towards her towel, she instinctively turned towards the mirror. Though completely fogged, she took her hand and wiped a space wide enough to examine her outline. She had never thought she was ugly, but she also knew as this everyday girl she wasn't nearly as hot as someone like Solar. Though similar in shape and sensual curves, she hid hers behind cotton and polyester instead of silk and lace.

First impressions were everything, and with someone like Kise, it was all that mattered.

Sighing, she wrapped herself in a towel and headed into her room, ready to dress and pour a glass of wine. What she ended up doing had her back out in the street just as flustered as when she entered. The moment she opened the door, she heard the soft moans and creaks from Suki's room and rolled her eyes. 

Just fucking great. Literally.

That left Plan B, which wasn't a thing before now but was the only option left. Heading straight for Kai's job, she was committed to catching the fiery woman before she could find someone better to do.

Despite being out of breath, Ari made it just in time to slip in and stand outside her office before the bell rang. She knew if she waited outside at the gate, her friend would dodge her and be MIA the rest of the night. This way, she could get right to the point. 

Knowing something needed to change before she lost her damn mind, Ari decided to see what all the fuss was about. If she could just shut it all off for a few hours...

Then the bell rang, and the door opened to a very shocked Kai.

It'll just be this one time... "Since Suki has the place on lock and I'm NOT trying to deal with Kise, why don't you take me to some dive to eat before we go home and change."

"Go home and...change?" Kai's eyebrow rose in confusion.

"Yeah. As in get naked and put on different clothes, not like to go home and become better people because we are tired of lying to ourselves." Ari's voice broke, and her lip quivered as tears started falling. She hadn't even realized she needed to cry. Hadn't even realized just how sad she was until she had to face it head-on. Or at least face it before she turned and ran. 

Frowning as her eyes saddened, Kai wrapped her friend in her arms and held her as she struggled not to cry. There were so many wounds between the two of them that sometimes forgetting was the only way to cope, and Ari had been lying and coping for so long.

"Alright, kiddo, let's go, but it may not be your scene."

Ari sniffled and smiled. "It's not like this is right now, either."


	7. Faces of Anger

It shouldn't matter anyway. The only ones here we're Satsuki and her. Though the surprise in his voice after Kise said it should have made her heart skip a beat, any war of emotions she should have had was squashed as soon as the tall blue haired figure appeared behind him.

As Aria’s mind screamed ’Holy shit’ her body instinctively turned in an attempt to shield Kai and get her back to her room. It would have worked, in theory, if the third tier of this pop-up version of hell hadn't reared its ugly head.

Damn you Ham.

That arrogant bastard was already behind Ari, having come out silently not long after the door had opened as if he smelled worthy prey entering his domain. And for the last few weeks, it had been his domain. Though he didn't have a key, he pretty much existed anytime Kai was home. It meant Ari had to watch as he chauvinistically tried to dominate Kai between his rough handed gestures and sleazy, sexist comments.

All of that Ari could tolerate, despite her blatant hatred for the uncouth blonde. What she couldn’t tolerate was watching the shattering of Kai’s glass prison. The one her mind danced inside of like a ballerina in a snow globe as her reality played out around her. Ari had tried numerous times to open a door and let her out, but it had all been in vain. This however would lead to a rape her friend's mind may never recover from.

Hand still gripping the pan whose contents were cold and long forgotten, the way some dreams should have stayed, Ari made to throw it at the blonde’s retreating form after he had smacked her ass and made those pointed comments about her stealing his boxers as he left, but the force and speed by which said boxers cleared the air and slam dunked into his face said Kai was well ahead of her.

Turning her head with veiled fear and repressed anger at the level of out of control the situation was, she attempted to catch the eye of her oblivious friend but instead watched in slow motion as the soul shattering scene unfolded in front of her. Never in her life had her voice betrayed her need to speak as it had now. As her mind and heart fought for dominance, her eyes captured frame by devastating frame the evolution of despair wrought from the flames of gut wrenching denial. 

You could tell they had been lovers and not the casual or sadistic kind like Kai and Ham, but the kind whose very limbs embrace and mold into the other. The kind who were never uncomfortable when wrapped up in each other. The kind who shared the same air and came alive with the same breath. The kind Ari hated from the depths of her soul because they embodied all the emotions she denied. Maybe it was her jealousy that kept her from talking, or maybe it was her own fear at the energy radiating from the dark haired Adonis as his very existence reached out to posses the fiery spirit in front on him long before his hands did. Even with only the readers digest on their life and death, the story of Aomine and Kai played out in her face and his flame as they got closer. 

Watching her friends face, Ari knew Kai could feel him. Knew her mind was trying to understand why the very thing she tried to deny was here forcing the void to close. Kai's body began to tense, her hands twitch, her eyes dry out as her pupils dilated and lids refused to close. She watched as Kai stopped breathing, trying not to inhale him for the drug he clearly was. 

Then he spoke.

And she broke once…twice…

His voice the timber of the ball as it slammed against the court, the harsh smack of the rim at is shot back up after a powerful slam dunk that almost broke the back board, and the earthshattering quake of feet as they trampled the very life of everyone in its path as it drove towards the only goal of the person propelling the game.

But this wasn't a game. These weren't infant hearts. These weren't screaming fans nor was this a test of skill. This was a return to a time lost, for a prize one never collected or never valued enough to retrieve. There were forces at work that both overwhelmed and overshadowed anything held within Ham's shallow retorts he seemed so proud of and no matter who stepped in to take the shot, the only ones able to claim victory stood on opposites sides unable to meet halfway. 

If it hadn't been for Kai telling Aomine to stop, the silence would have killed them all, well all except Ham whose banana hammocked ass now resided out of site. 

It was Kise that surprised her though. When Kai told him with the venom of a thousand snakes that he had a lot to explain he had rounded on her and put his hands on her, forcing her to face him and explain herself. Why had she taken Ari down into her cesspool with her? How could she endanger someone she loved like that?

Then the focus had turned to her as Kai let it slip that he was being a dick and should look around to the people who he so thoughtlessly trampled before yanking her arm back, giving a sharp retort and fleeing for the bathroom. She was always good at deflecting, even if it meant those around her got hurt in the process. 

Shocked that his sister would hit on the very thing he had tried to convey in his text to Ari, he looked at the woman still stationed at the stove with varying levels of hurt that she had seen the text but not responded, knowing now she had been out in a place he had always wanted to go with her but been denied. 

When their eyes met, Ari's became sharp and guarded. "You have no right to look at me like that Kise. After all the damage you have done in the last few days, you will be lucky to keep your sister since you don't seem capable of keeping or valuing friends."

Frustration and hurt rapidly compounding on his already battered conscious. He turned on her. "And you have the right to ignore me and my feelings after one innocent mistake I had no conscious control over? I tried numerous times, including last night, to apologize and get you to let me explain or at least sort out what happened, but you just shut me out and walked away. If I had known you were such a coward I wouldn't have wasted my time on you all those years ago." It came out without thought, without reason, just as pure emotion tied to the heartstrings of an abandoned soul in a world of lies. As the last words left, their weight began to suffocate him as his train wrecked pride took hold held bent on taking everything down with it.

Watching as her hand came up to cover her mouth while her eyes became the glass that reflected the ripples of her anger, his mind fought to say the things his juvenile heart twisted and spat out. 

"Coward?" Her choked voice managed to sputter out as an eerie chill filled the room. 

There were many things Kise had never learned about Ari as he had been too self centered and shallow to allow her to feel she could share her true feelings with him. Some were as insignificant as her tells when she lied or avoided things while others were as dark as black holes. In this case Kise found himself violating her number one rule for angering Ari. Never back her into a corner emotionally or physically as she took no mercy.

"Would a coward…" she began in a very tense voice as she moved to the dishwasher and busied herself with emptying it "…spend every waking moment piecing together the broken shards and dust of your sisters heart as she walked barefoot across them trying to dismiss the pain at the same time she relived it in every breath another man caressed her skin with? Would a coward…" she picked up a kitchen knife and ran her index finger down it, pressing the flesh into it to see how sharp it still was while knowing just how much pressure it would take to pierce the flesh "…live in the very hell your sister has become the abomination of just to provide her a modicum of salvation and honesty so her soul keeps repenting in a healthy way instead of with her body?" Then she places the knife in the drawer and pulls out a julianer, bringing it to her neck as she rakes the spikes across her skin enough to scratch the surface slightly "Would a coward face you every day knowing you will never value them as much as they value you, while not caring because your happiness is far more important than the existence they can carve for themselves?" With the word carve she turned and dug the spiked ends into her skin creating the same indents in her neck that Ham had left on Aria, allowing the blood to pool into droplets and fall down her neck in the wake of tears she could not shed.

Speachless, Kise just stood there mouth open as Aomine watched in reserved astonishment.

"Get out both of you, and never come back. Both of you have no right to the hell we live here. You are all too self centered and righteous to think beyond what affects you and what you want. You never think that love is both sides of an eternal coin that flips endlessly until both sides are worn flat." Her voice is deathly quiet and stern, but gets the point across. Glaring at them, Kise tries to speak but Aomine walks up and grabs his arm. 

"Why don’t we listen to the lady. For once meeting this one on one or even two on one seems like odds we don’t want to test." Then looking briefly at Aria, Aomine drags Kise outside, making sure the door closes quietly on a life once lead and a beginning that had fallen apart before it even began.


	8. Falling Out & Falling In

Yanking himself free as soon as they cleared the door, Kise turned on Aomine with controlled anger. "What the hell did you do that for! I wasn't finished!"

"Yeah, but she was, and if it's one thing I've learned from dating your sister, it's women like that are better left on their terms. You only pick a fight when you know you can win, and she had you grossly outnumbered by will alone."

"How the FUCK would you know that you selfish prick! You have been back less than a day, and already you are a fucking expert!"

Barking a short laugh, Aomine shakes his head before jamming his hands in his pockets. "Go cool off, Kise. You step back in there. She will eat you alive. If you can't see why it means you're the same idiot as when I left." Then he walks off, saying, "See you back at the apartment."

Then Kise is left standing there caught between two realities he wasn't equipped to face. After glancing at the door a few agonizing seconds, he forces himself to admit that Aomine is right. Ari had never thrown him out nor been that angry ever. It would probably be better if both parties cooled off and tried to come back to it with clearer heads. Turning and leaving his lips set in a firm line.

"If you can't see why it means you're the same idiot as when I left." it wasn't just Aomine's words that bothered him; it was the fact that they alluded to something even he saw. The question was, what was it, and why could he see it? He had run just as easily from dealing with his sister, so there couldn't possibly be anything there he wanted to salvage. If that were the case, then what was he missing that both he and Aria shared? They had never been friends, and though Ari didn't know him, she disliked the tall blue-haired man on principle for the state he had left her best friend in. 

With no answer forming by the time he reached the bottom level of the complex, he decided the best thing to do would be to clear his head the only way he knew how, and the only way that always brought results.

\------

Unable to hold herself together once Suki got home, Ari used the excuse of needing to go to work to quickly dress and leave the apartment. Fortunately, Suki asked no questions, most likely since she was already headed to the bathroom to tend to Kai as Ari escaped through the front door. I'm sorry Kai, I need some space myself right now. I hope you understand. Her heart said as its silent words reached back before the door closed and released her from the horror that had befallen that morning.

With each step, Aria took from the apartment, the foundation of her world began to crumble like a shale between her fingertips. Brittle, like her heart after banishing the one person in the world she had loved more than anything, hunks of her soul crashed to the floor as the shockwaves from each step rippled along the fault lines of her body. Fortunately for her, she could make it to the shop on autopilot because, by the time her body fell against the door on the inside of the shop, she was sobbing as she curled her knees against her. Placing her forehead against them and her arms around them, she shook violently as years worth of dismissed feelings tore through her.

!Get out!' her mind screamed. Get out, get out, get out...

"GET OUT!" Her anguished sobbing scream tore from her as she flung her purse in front of her, the contents spilling out onto the floor. How had she let herself become such a mess?

Then her phone clattered on the floor as it vibrated, letting her know she had a new text. Glaring at it, she barked, "Fuck you" before resting her cheek on her knee and looking at the far wall. 

Three more times, it vibrated, forcing her to acknowledge the person just to shut them up. Standing up with irritation flooding through her, she walked two steps and picked it up before her eyes went wide.

Tai

Just got into town and as always you are my first stop after the hotel

Tai

I'll be there in 45 min so make sure you are free

Tai

And don't worry I came prepared

Laughing slightly in spite of herself, Aria let her heart melt a second at Taiga Kagami's thoughtfulness. Living in Paris for the last few years after college touring Europe as he provided contractual support, seminars, and Ted Talks on basketball and the importance of team building, as well as scouting Taiga, was surrounded with premier fashion labels that made him look like some wealthy billionaire. Up until three visits ago, he had always visited Ari with some Italian or Euro trend suit far beyond her tailoring capabilities, making her feel inferior and unworthy of outfitting his body. The next time, being this time, he assured her he would dress appropriately and make up for how inconsiderate he had been, not of his own volition. Ari had pouted, and Tai had laughed, but only this visit would tell if he was messing with her or not.

Closing out his messages, Ari furrowed her brow at a missed text from Kise. Not knowing it was from last night nor caring what he wanted to say, she deleted it without reading it. Unlike Tai, nothing Kise said served anyone but himself. Thinking back, Ari wondered what things would have been like if she had just said yes to Tai's love confession in high school instead of holding out for Kise. 

Having been close friends, letting Tai down wasn't world-shattering. Tai knew full well she loved Kise but told her he was capable of making her much happier so he would wait and love her enough for both of them until she was ready. He had been so forceful in his confession and earnest with his intentions. There was no reason to believe he wouldn't do exactly as he said, something over the years he proved in little ways when he came to visit.

As the only person in the world, she could tell everything to and not feel it would cause a family civil war, the thought of Tai being here to separate her from the chaos was a welcome presence. Closing her phone, she looked at her watch.

"Fuck." She only had twenty minutes to pull herself together, or she would never hear the end of it."

With a third cold towel pressed to her eyes, Ari's phone vibrates, and her heart leaps. Even when Kise and her were in a "good" space, Tai never ceased to make her smile, and her heart leap. His personality was so overwhelming, especially since he had moved away and formed his own life. Though still an abrasive, straight forward, the intense man, he flew off the handleless and challenged things head-on more tactfully than he used to. He had also become suaver in his demeanor, buffing out the rough edges that most people felt made him unapproachable. 

Tai

Let me in?

Stuffing the wet towel into the rack on the wall, Ari checked her face one last time before heading toward the front door. No matter what she expected, it wouldn't have been something her heart could handle. As the door opened up and Tai's signature smirk met her, she crumpled to the floor in tears for the second time that day. Dressed in basketball shorts, his standard red and black Jordan's and a heather gray loose fitted tank eh embodied everything about her past she was trying to forget. 

"Tai..ga.." she sniffled in between sobs, and he fell with her and held her against his chest, tucking her head under his chin.

"I'm right here...let's get inside and see just what's happened since I have been gone." A sentence he already knew the answer to and swore he would put a stop to if for no other reason than to never see her cry like her entire life had been destroyed in the blink of an eye.


	9. Broken Dreams

There were only a few days where if Kagami closed his eyes he could smell and touch the scene his mind played out in front of him no matter where he was or what he was doing. The day he had confessed his feelings to Ariella Tetsuki was easily the clearest memory he could recall. 

Tai, as she called him, had come by to pick her up when her after school drama class let out to make sure she made it home safely. He had been nervous as fuck even though he knew she knew and that she would say no. Still he had to tell her. She had to know that his feelings weren’t childish and his love for her rivaled the love she held for that worthless blonde poster child for idiocy. 

Trying not to walk stiffly, he lead her to the back side of the basketball court where the cherry blossom tree that grew in a plot in the sidewalk next to the school rained pink petals down around them. Standing and facing her with smolderingly intense eyes he cupped her cheek and said, “You know I love you right?” That’s when the smell of her shampoo had wafted past his nose as her hair got lifted by a warm breeze making him dizzy for a second.

“Yes.” She said before placing her hand gently over his.

“And you know I will never stop loving you because it is as intrinsic to me as playing basketball?”

She nods.

“And your answer is still no, correct?”

That’s when her eyes got sad and she tried to look away but he turned her chin back to face him. “Don’t look away, you have nothing to ashamed of. I know you love Kise. I know you love him as much as I love you. Even knowing that I will not back down. Instead I will love you enough for both of us until you realize that the love you feel now pales in comparison to the love we are capable of together.” That’s when the branches of the cherry tree rustled and a cyclone of petals reigned down around them. It was easily Tai’s most precious memory of her.

Which is why holding her against him as he shut and locked the door, listening to her wracked sobs as she gripped his shirt tight enough her manicured nails dug into the flesh of his chest, threatened to shatter the sanctity of that dream. Not because it would remain unfulfilled but because her tears meant his love hadn’t been enough to save her from the pain she now felt. 

Running his hand down the back of her head, caressing the silken locks he had dreamt night after night of twining his fingers in, he supported her lower back with the other as his back took the brunt of the weight by leaning against the locked door. 

“Let me guess.” It was a statement not a question and one that increases her wails exponentially. Grinding his teeth he took a deep, measured breath in before exhaling with just as much calculation; letting her tears fall until her voice was caught between hiccups and sniffles. Still petting her head he leaned his own back a little. “Shall I tell you a story?”

Truth be told his stories were awful, but for some reason Ari always loved them and they were the only thing that made her smile when her world seemed to fall apart. 

Turning her eyes up and cocking her head sideways she half pouts. “You just got here and already you are trying to bore me to death?”

Tai just smiled and took his hand from her hair to run the back of his index finger under her eyes as he collected the tears. “Once upon a time there was a little fish named Tetsu who was silver in color with a soft blue hue. Now Tetsu was a unique fish. Much like these water droplets, he was insignificant at first glance but when partnered with a larger stream he became the force that bound the school…”

It had taken two more stories and a little bit of shoving as Tai purposefully exaggerated the stories so Ari would react in a positive way before the fog of sadness that glazed over her eyes lifted. Once they stayed dry long enough for her stomach to hurt from laughing, he stood up before gently pulling her up with him. "If you want to know how that one ends…" Tai looked at her with an exaggerated and teasing smile.

"I think I'm good Shakespeare. Now if you would be so kind as to let me get my stuff, we can start in on your reason for being here." Ari says as she tries to turn, but Tai interrupts her.

He had known her too long to not see the tells and like hell he was going to let her keep deflecting. "Don't lie to me Ari." His voice was firm but not demanding. "I can see in the way your eyes drag while trying not to look at me as your body turns to walk away. I can see it in the way your hand fidgets with your ring fingers as you fake cracking your knuckles, something you only ever did when you were stressed and needed a distraction. I can even see it in your feet. From the moment you stood up your toes pointed out showing your need to run instead of facing what's bothering you head on." Taking her gently by the elbow he turns her around, though this time he doesn't force her to look at him. "You don’t have to talk if you don't want to, but at least let me listen when you need me to."

Taking a deep shuddered breath in, Ari looks up and smiles genuinely but sadly. "Thank you Tai."

"You don't need to thank me. At least not until we are done eating." Then offering her his elbow, which she took with a slight blush, he guided her outside towards a future that didn't seem so bleak.

———

“Don’t you get sick of sneaking up on people?” Tai said with a glare as he stared across the table at Kuroko with his arms crossed as Ari nuzzled his cheek and squeezed him “unnecessarily” as far as he was concerned. 

As was Koriko’s way, Tai had gone to sit down next to Ari in the booth in the back corner by the large bay window of the diner near her work after having hung his coat on the wall next to her. When he turned back around, there was Kuro sipping on a milk shake having popped out of nowhere sitting in his spot. This left Tai no choice but to sit across from her and bitterly jab at the shorter male as Ari’s excitements seeing the shrimpy illusionist skyrocketed. 

“Awwww Tai don’t be mean to Tetsuuuu. He’s just so cuuuuute.” She said with a slight baby voice that made Tai’s skin crawl as she smooshed his face. 

“Stalker’s aren’t cute. I swear he thrives on other people’s misery.” Tai leaned back in the booth and elevated his glare by picking up his own drink that had recently arrived, without looking, to sip on it while never deviating his gaze from Kuro’s steely impassive eyes. 

“Don’t be mad Kagami. Ari can’t help she likes me better. Even after all this time my personality is still better than yours. I’m sure my basket is as well.”

“Don’t bet your Houdini loving ass on it blind spot. Tai growls under his breath as he places his cup down a little too hard. “I’ll be happy to go one on one any time. 

“Now boys don’t fight. It’s been a rough day and I would love to spend it with two of my favorite people.” Ari smiles genuinely at Tai before kicking him gently under the table on the shin. 

“Ow! Violent as ever.” Tai feigned mortal injury as he reached his hand under the table to pinch Ari’s leg.

“You know I have a girlfriend.” Tetsu said flatly as he rested his cheek on his palm as the empty sounds of milkshake at the bottom of the glass rang out.

“Wel why the hell was your leg there?”

Kuro just blinked once without answering before pulling his straw out with his lips; accidentally flicking it as it exits the plastic top so that traces fling onto Tai’s face. 

Though the male version of Ari, minus the sexual attraction, Tetsu and Kagami’s relationship was founded off an innate partnership born from competition and talent. They were the kind of friends that could pick up where they left off no matter how many years passed. That didn’t mean there wasn’t some bitterness there somewhere.

Grabbing the nearest napkin, Tai wiped his face carefully before scrunching the napkin and throwing it at Tetsu’s face. 

Dodging it effortlessly, Tetsu reached out and grabbed Taiga’s drink before stealing a sip.

“Damnit you Tetsu! Don’t you gave a girlfriend to bother?”

That’s when the soft voice of Suki rang out from the other side of the diner. “Tetsuuuu! We’re you waiting long?” 

“Speak of the devil.”

“Awwwww Kagamiiiiii.” She whined. “Why didn’t you tell me you were in town?”

Sighing as Tai gave up on trying to have a nice quiet evening with the only person he never got enough of, he turned to the pink haired female and forcefully smiled. “I just got in not long ago and needed some clothes so I visited Ari first.”

Wincing as Tetsu kicked him for real on the shin, not buying the lie his girlfriend clearly believed, Tai added, “Sorry Satsuki.”

Bouncing over to sit next to Tai, she leans in. “That’s okay Kagi. I forgive you. Just don’t leave before saying goodbye okay?”

“Yes ma’am.” He rolls his eyes in mock irritation before she pushes him playfully which makes Ari giggle. Turning to look her direction he saw her eyes laughing and her lips spread in a generous smile. Resigning himself completely to his fate, he had to admit that even if he wasn’t the one doing it, this happiness was the only thing that would override her pain.


	10. Distance Makes The Heart Grow Fonder?

There was both trepidation and relief when Tetsu and Suki left a few hours later. Not the awkward kind that signaled a moment of tension but the anxiety ridden anticipation of facing off with something larger than yourself and not having enough time to prepare. 

With a final "Don't stick your nose where it doesn't belong." From Tetsu as he stared once more at Tai before Suki pushed him from behind until they were out the front door, Ari's mind snapped back to reality like a rubber band released at peak extension. Fortunately, silence around Tai meant something completely different than when it happened around Kise.

Frowning at the thought of the incorrigible blonde, she grimaced and squeezed her glass slightly as she stared into its Icey remnants. 

"You know you keep showing me that face and I'm gonna start taking it personal. I don't think I've seen you frown this much around me since…well ever."

Startled out of her leaching thoughts Ari turns to find Tai sitting next to her with his chin resting on her palm; a serious expression on his face as he looks at her critically.

"Sorry Tai I…" Then she sets her lip and breathes out sharply. "I won't say it's nothing I…just don't know what to do anymore." Her eyebrows scrunch in worry as she chewed her lip and ran her thumbs up and down the glass she hadn’t relinquished a hold on. 

"Knowing you, saying something like 'You aren't supposed to know dummy you are just supposed to do' wont inspire you to release whatever it is that is bothering you." Then Tai's large hand lands on Ari's head heavily before rubbing gently back and forth. "Instead, why don't you just stop worrying about what you can't say and instead focus on what you need to do so it's not an issue. I've never known you to avoid an issue. Your up front forwardness is actually one of the things I really like about you.” 

That’s when Ari tilts her head up and glowers at him. 

“I’d hate it if your face stuck that way.” His smile was soft and accepting not vapid and self-absorbed. It was a look that took all of her and cradled it gently against him as he accepted her entirely without expecting anything from her but what she could give. It was easy to get lost in that smile and those dangerously fierce eyes. Monster how many time she found her reflection within them or how many months had gone by without him the still captivated her in ways that overwhelmed her. 

”Course if you keep looking at me like that you will make it damn near impossible to think of anything but you when I leave.”

The deep reverberations of his voice as it dropped an octave lower to almost a seduce whisper snapped her back to the reality that she was starting in his eyes with a longing she didn't even understand the depth of. 

Blushing deeply and turning to grab her stuff she scrambled for verbal purchase in an attempt to stave off the awkward moment and unrelenting draw she felt was pulling her towards Tai in ways she hadn't recognized as options. 

”Speaking of leaving, I should probably get back. Why don't you come by tomorrow and I'll draft you some things to get you through the next few days.” She smiled awkwardly, her eyes darting between Tai and the door.

”Sure, Whatever works best for you. Shall I take you home or…” leaving the thought to hang so Ari either had to pick it up or leave it precariously dangling on irresponsible wishes and trampled dreams. 

Ari winced at the thought of going home, but knew that she couldn’t avoid it forever. “Home I guess.” Though only the second to last place she wanted to be, it was the first place she knew she could bounce off the sounding board she desperately needed.

———

As her front door clicked shut, Ari let in a deep sigh of relief. The house seemed empty, which provided her a few more moments to avoid everything she…

“Where the fuck have you been?” KSU’s voice came from the couch that she was apparently sprawled on, though her short stature and average endowments meant nothing visibly breached the crest of the armrest to give away her position. 

Frowning in distaste Ari clapped back. “Of all the people to ask you are the last to deserve and answer to that Ms. If-your-best-friend-could-put-out-an-amber-alert-out-on-a-grown-ass-clinically-sane-adult-she-would.” Then Ari hung her bag on the coat rack before heading to her room. 

“Hypocrite or not I still expect an answer!” Kai yelled at her retreating form but Ari was now too irritated to answer. Did both siblings have to be so irresponsible and delusional about how they affected other people?

Crossing the threshold of her room in long easy strides, Ari attempted to close her bedroom door behind her but a foot and a high pitched “Ow! Fucker that hurt” raked against her highly sensitive nerves.

“Now isn’t the time Kai. I’m not interested in placating your self destructive behavior. Take a hint and leave.” Though her words weren’t harsher than she felt, her tone was more broken than she intended to admit to being. 

For a moment two broken souls stood at a chasm, one at each side. To cross the chasm and breach the gap one would have to give while the other took. Though obvious in concept it was easily the hardest choice to make as it forced one to relinquish their hold on reality as the other continued to potentially wallow in it. 

Fortunately for Kai, dealing with Ari’s issues was a lot easier than comprehending her own. Sighing out in one quick breath through flared nostrils, Kai bridged the gap. 

“This isn’t your normal anger Ria. Something isn’t right.” She watched her friend closely as she sat on her bed.

Reaching down to pick up a small blonde haired doll dressed in regal finery that should have cost her nearly $100 had she not made the clothes herself, Ari locked eyes on the artificial visage of her beloved knight. “After leaving the apartment I headed to work, which I’m sure you guessed.”

Kai just sat and listened.

“When I got there I collapsed and started bawling. It felt like the world I knew, the world I had existed in was all a fallacy. That the love I held for Kise for so long truly meant something only to me and that maybe, just maybe I had truly been foolish all this time.” That’s when Ari turned teary eyes to Kai and with a shaking lip continued. “That’s when Tai texted me and said he was in town and wanted to stop by, which he did. I thought I would be okay, I thought I could also fool him, but I should have known better.”

Turning her head Ari stared in front of her at nothing in particular as she stroked the dolls hair. 

“He saw right through me. Even after months of being apart he new me even better than the last time somehow. We went to dinner where he ran into Tetsu and Suki…” that’s when she finally smiled a melancholy smile “…and it was like no time had passed since the last time we were all together.”

Then Ari turned back with a perplexed and slightly anguished look. “How can it be that the man I rejected knows me better than I know myself, even from a distance, yet the man my heart has devoted to for almost a decade can barely even remember the most obvious details of my life and I am with him religiously? How is it looking into his eyes costs me spandex of time where I forget even my name yet I look into Kise’s and all I see is a blank stare that looks right through me? HOW IS IT that the man I would sell my very soul for can utter words of love that mean nothing when I can’t escape a single night without vowing my heart time and time again while Taiga can, without skipping a beat, speed my heart just by hinting that my longing gaze could send him into madness?! YOU TELL ME KAI! YOU TELL ME RIGHT NOW! WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME KAI? WHY IS SOME NAMELESS MODEL MORE ENRAPTURING TO KISE THAN THE VERY WOMAN WHO EMBODIES EVERTY LIVING PASSION HE COUKD HOPE FOR! IF IM NOT ENOUGH…” the sobs are uncontrollable now “…if I am not enough then why keep on fighting a battle I cannot win? Why not lie with the enemy and live the life I could have had, had love not been so cruel?”

There were no words Kai could give her. No wishes for a brighter future. Truth be told she herself couldn’t see past the fog that had enshrouded her heart with doubt and insecurity. The only thing she could do was hold her friend as she came to cry in her arms on the bed as Kai rocked her back an forth. It was all Kai could do though in all honesty it was as much to calm Ari as it was to keep Kai herself moving so she couldn’t run as well.


	11. Let The Mother Fucker Burn

Once Ari was more emotionally stable, Kai had left but not before pointing to a pile of letters on her pillow.

“Can you deal with that, please? No one can get any mail if he keeps cramming letters into the box being the passive-aggressive prick he is.” She said without venom before walking out and closing the door. 

Turning to look at the pile in question, Ari sighed heavily. Though Kise got points for resourcefulness, Ari no longer needed to read them to know he lost all of them with each word written inside the pages. 

This faux Shakespearean game had all begun with their first real fight. At the time Kise was dating some girl from Science class so she could tutor him and had said some insensitive stuff to Ari about how he wouldn't study with her because it would be boring since he didn't want to get into her pants. As a result, Ari refused to talk to him for a week that turned into three days when he inundated her locker, her gym locker, her desks and anything else he could stuff them into with letters of apology. 

Originally Ari thought it was sweet and that maybe he had had a change of heart, but as she read more and more of the letters she realized all he cared about was getting in her good graces because he hated fighting with her AND Kai, who verbally abused him daily after his insensitive comments started this mess.

Now as she sat on the bed with the letters in hand, a sadness clutched her heart that felt all encompassing. He hadn’t and probably would never change. He would never see her the way she wanted or the way she guessed Tai always had. With a pang of regret for all her wasted effort and lost time, she slowly stood up before pulling her phone out.

Though the distance from her room to the wood burning fireplace in the living room wasn’t that far, the emotional weight was crushing as she videoed the walk from start to finish in silence. When she got to the fireplace she made sure to turn the stack over to show none had been tampered with before throwing them in the cold fire, reaching up to grab the igniter, and clicking it on before touching it to corner of one of the envelopes. 

Much like her love for Kise it hadn’t taken long for the envelope to catch on fire and overwhelm the paper. As the flames licked closer and closer to complete consumption of the unrequited thoughts and feelings within, Ari found herself getting lighter as the weight of her own emotions lessened. When the paper was reduced to blackened crisps she stopped the video and attached it to a text that she sent to Kise. Without a word to accompany it she watched as the message was read, the dots of thought appeared and then the screen stayed blank.

When no response came after a few minutes nor a figure barging in demanding her forgiveness, she turned off her phone. It would be hard to see this as the end of everything she had longed for for so long. From this point on Kise was a client and maybe a friend. It would take some adjustment but it also felt very freeing. 

——————

The second Kise saw the text from Ari he almost broke his phone dropping it as he tried to answer it. When he saw her message, however, he almost wished he had. He had never been good with words, not like she was, so writing her those letters then and now had taken all his mental fortitude and to see her destroy them without even glancing once meant she was way madder than he anticipated. 

“Fuck.” The anxiety in his voice thick as he sat down on the chaise by the balcony window. 

“You shouldn’t have called her a coward.” Aomine’s emotionless voice grated against his mind as he came to sit on the couch perpendicular to Kise. “There isn’t a cowardly bone in her body if you don’t count her aversion to dealing with her own feelings.”

“What would you know about anyone’s feelings? You’ve denied Kai’s so long she is no longer recognizable as the girl you loved and left.” Kise spat back half over his shoulder. 

“Maybe regarding everyone else I’d take that hit but I spent a lot of time with you and her on and off the court so I know how to read your bodies. I also know how everyone else reacts to each other. I may not be able to break her delusion yet but that doesn’t mean I can’t see it and will allow her to continue with it.”

“What is with you two? Both you and Kai seem to have this notion that I can’t truly see what’s going on with Ari. I fucking know she is mad because I said something insensitive. I’m trying to fix it, but she won’t talk to me.”

Aomine just snickers and shakes his head. “Still an idiot pretty boy.”

“What the fuck does that mean!” Kise now thoroughly pissed, turns to face Aomine with a scowl that makes him roll his eyes. 

“I don’t understand why I have to be the one to say something. I’m the last person that wants to get involved.”

“What do you mean by that? What is it that you know that I don’t?”

Aomine gives an exasperated sigh. “It’s not just me. Everyone knows but you.”

Kise just stares at him with a blank expression on his face. “Knows what?”

Placing his forearms on his knees as he leans forward and clasps his hands loosely, Aomine states unblinking into Kise’s eyes just like he did when he had the upper hand on the court.

“Why do you supposed Ari hangs around you so much or at least did until today?”

“That’s easy because we work together and happen to also be friends.”

“Let’s be clear, you mean you have been friends with her. That being said, has it never occurred to you to be…more than friends? I mean with how much she knows about you and how well she puts up with you it doesn’t seem so far fetched. It’s not like she isn’t attractive.”

“Date Ari? Hell no! She’s like…a member of my family!”

“As we are all painfully aware.” Then Aomine sighs and leans back resting his arms in the back of the couch. “Did you never think even for a moment that Ari might have feelings for you?”

Kise’s eyes go big. “Ari? Have feelings for me? Yeah right! She’s seen who I date. I don’t want to settle down. I’ve got my career and…”

That’s when Aomine holds up a hand to silence him. “As someone who took the same path you tread now let me give you a word of advice. Love is the only thing that beat me on and off the court. Once you realize what you’ve lost you will realize that what you could have had is far more precious.” Then he gets up and heads to the guest room. “I’d quit lying to myself if I were you. After all you are a pro at rejecting people’s feelings, just be honest for once. Just don’t be surprised when she leaves you in the dust if she hasn’t already.”

Then the door closed and Kise was left trying to wrap his mind around a feeling he didn’t know anything about for a person he was beginning to believe he had never truly known.


	12. Heat

Despite thinking she felt relieved by her recent book burnings, Ari hadn't been able to sleep soundly. Whether it was the guilt over what she did or the guilt over hurting Kise so bad he, for once, had nothing to say she couldn't tell. All she knew was that at 5:30 in the morning there was no hope of her going back to sleep. Dressing quickly and quietly she melded into the comforting silence that permeated her surroundings. Though by no means delusional that there was anyone to wake up with Kai almost never here and Satsuki able to sleep like a log, disturbing the rare peace she found in the still air of the morning seemed almost taboo.

Other than the coffee shop down the street, which was a given, the only place she had to go was work. Seeing how she still had clothes to prepare for Tai, she figured nothing beat an early start. Stepping out of the sanctity of the home she had help create on broken dreams, damaged souls and friendship, she stepped out onto the street only to stare in shock that she wasn't the only one who ceased the day in an opportunity.

"Fancy meeting you here." Tai's voice smiled with the laugh he spoke through as he stretched several feet from her position. Wearing basketball shorts and a tank, he was the epitome of casual dedication. Ever since school he had run the same path early every morning, making sure to pass by her house on the tale end just to see if he would catch her in time to walk to school with him and maybe stop by a café or something before hand. Some days it worked, but most days she wasn't even home having spent the night at Kise's trying to keep his life in check.

A slight blush crossed her cheeks, which she hopes was lost in the rising light of the sun as it began its morning free throw across the sky. “Didn’t think I’d call you as soon as I got into the office and set up?” She teases with a slight bashfulness she was unaccustomed to.

“I know you would, but that shouldn’t change my routine. I’ve been running this road for as long as I’ve known you and for the very same reasons I do today." Lifting up the bottom corner of his tank to wipe his brow, he casually exposed both a solidity of character conditioned by a devout dedication to a cause only grasped by the passionate and a cloaked seduction that had lain dormant to her senses for a length of time she could no longer count. Though only a glimpse, she suddenly began to grasp the depth and strength of his resolve over what could be considered his long game. "That being said, shall I walk you to work?"

It was too early in the morning for all these implied emotions, especially without having coffee first. That meant the only capable response was a stupid one. "That's fine, but you aren't coming in until you take a shower, and the shop doesn't have one so you will have to back to your room first." Her voice attempted to be assertive, but she was still shaken by the fact that he was still here with the same emotions while she, so raw emotionally, couldn't defend against them.

"That's easy enough. We can go by your shop first and get what you need then go back to my room and you can make a house call. It won't be the first time seeing as you have done it for that blonde idiot all these years."

Ari couldn't miss the tang of jealousy laced in that last statement. "True. Speaking of which, why have you never asked me just to come to your room when you visit for a house call then?"

"For the same reason I don't fly you to Europe every time a need a wardrobe change. It's not a reasonable request when I can come to you. You have everything you need at your shop. Why would I be so selfish and lazy that I disrupt your ideal working environment just to suit my childish desires. Either way I get to see you so why does the place matter?"

Turning her head to the side knowing full well her escalating blush couldn't go unnoticed unless the sun lit the world on fire, she replied with a simple, "I see. Well, I appreciate your consideration, but I am happy to do whatever you need. We are friends aren't we."

Aria would never be sure what part had been the "mistake" that lead to this moment. No matter how far she looked back, there was always a plausible starting incident that tied to something else that could be just as good a reason as anything else. No matter what she tried to tie to the cause, nothing mattered in the moment it happened.

With the speed of a player capitalizing on a steal, Tai clasps Ari's arm and swings her around. Pulling her gently against his chest, his free hand cups the back of her head and his lips descend on hers. Enveloped by both his arms gently encompassing embrace and his lips tentative aggression she becomes captive to the caged beast who has padded by her side as a familiar shadow for years. Before she can form a coherent thought, his lips part from hers and brush her ear.

"I have loved you beyond friends since our time began. I made no secret of that, despite you never returning those feelings. I never faulted how you felt nor held those feelings against you, but what I will not do is suppress mine further now that I have every intent to not leave without you." Pulling back slowly but not releasing his hold, Tai smiles down with soft eyes as his hand on the back of Ari's head slides down her hair. "I apologize in advance for any difficulty this causes you, but know no matter what I will always be by your side. Being with you is as essential as breathing. I, unlike some, will never sacrifice that." Then the heat of his closeness recedes and Ari is hit with just how cold the world without him is.

"Right." Too stunned to say anything else she just agrees.

"Then shall we?" Placing a hand back on her lower back, he guides her around and forward down a familiar path she has never tread and towards a life she should have always considered.

\------------

Kai couldn't explain why she had the sudden desire to check on Aria that morning as she entered the house. It was not like she was ever up at 6:30 in the morning or she ever went anywhere, but something about the way she looked last night as Kai left her room told her a shift had occurred and her best friend might be going down a road Kai knew all too well.

Locking the door as quietly as possible, she crept silently towards Ari's room. Placing her hand slowly on the knob, she circled its room temperature sphere with a delicacy she didn't even know she possessed, especially this early after being out so late. Turning it incrementally so as not to make the latch click, it took several seconds before the door was able to swing open and Kai could step in to the empty room beyond.

Confused, she shot off a half coherent text.

I finally might know how you feel when you come into my room and find me unexpectedly not there after a rough night. Let's skip the feelings shit and just get to the point.

The reply wouldn’t come for another two hours as she sat on the couch flipping through channels.

I’m fine. Taiga is here.

Taiga. "Fuck." She had been right. Even if Ari didn't know it the wheels were shifting and Kise was rapidly losing whatever ground he thought he had to stand on. If he didn't hurry up…sighing heavily, she let herself fall sideways onto the couch. "What a fucking mess this all is."

Eventually she would fall asleep, only to wake in time to watch the game she had come home to make sure she didn't miss since there was no man in the world worth missing a game for…at least not any more. Trying not to wallow in thoughts of unrequited love while her best friend waded in the waves of passion that seemed so fleeting for Kai now, she put on some inane shit and closed her eyes. Today was a new day and though that usually meant new bullshit it also meant another chance to figure out just where she expected to go now that *the road to love was littered by the bones of others who by the magic of the moment were mysteriously undone.

\----------

*" " by Gordon Lightfoot


	13. Be Kind

The walk to the hotel Tai was staying at was surreal. Like so many walks they had shared coming back from school, going to and from A to B not really caring where they went and with no real timeline, there was an odd familiarity and folding of timelines as Ari and him walked side by side breaths apart looking ahead. The only difference this time was that Ari was incredibly conscious of how close he was where as every other time she had absentmindedly been absorbed in everything but the electric heat that seemed to continuously permeate in various degrees from every surface on Tai's body.

Like two polar magnets, their hands would swing to parallel before being repelled the second before they touched to continue on their pendulum swing as their opposite strides carried them forward. The more she concentrated on it the more Ari noticed how many things she hadn't ever been conscious of. Had Tai always walked this close to her? Had he always resonated with such heat in her presence? Had he always looked out of the corner of his eye with every significant move she made? Had they always been this tense and yet comfortable?

It was … weird. Not bad, just more woke. It made her see how lifeless everything around her was in comparison to the passion and drive this man had. What was it like to carry all this energy for a person and yet look so controlled about it, never overwhelming her with its intensity just throwing in passing remarks or subtle gestures…well subtle until recently.

Shuddering slightly despite the moderate temperature, Ari tried to brush it all to the back of her mind and focus on the task at hand. She was here to fit Tai for whatever he needed. At his room. Just the two of them. Swallowing hard her eyes gave away the anxiety she was trying to hide.

"If I didn't know any better I would say you were suddenly overwhelmed by the potential of being alone with a man in his suite?" His voice sweet, joking and soft; teasing with a familiarity that tried to play down how uncomfortable he assumed the dynamic might be for her after their kiss.

Glancing quickly at Tai, Ari was grateful he kept his eyes forward despite knowing he was painfully aware of every vibration of her presence. "Yeah right, what are we in high school?" The jab hit her suddenly as her carelessness reminded her that her first time being with a guy alone that wasn't her dad had been Kise who had also been half naked for a fitting.

Not skipping a beat, Tai gently filled in the pieces of her heart that tried to fissure. "Well even if it was I promise it will be everything your first experience should be. I am a gentleman after all."

That was when his hand gently captured hers and pulled her back to reality as he tucked it into the crook of his arm before carefully setting her on the path up the steps leading up to his building.

Stumbling momentarily as her conscious narrowed in on the front doors, she glanced over her shoulder one last time as if to capture the last moment before the innocence she once knew faded before facing forward and penetrating the inner sanctum of the life she had given up for a dream she never wanted to believe would end.

\-------------------

When they arrived at his door there were no fancy bells and whistles outside like there were in some rentable penthouse suites. The furniture inside was also quite minimalistic; possessing only what was necessary and leaving nothing to suggest he meant anything but business.

"Feel free to put your things anywhere that suits you. A maid comes in and cleans every day and I don't have much to mess the place up with so it's not like you will do any harm to anything. Besides, I rent this room every time I am in town. The owner is a former client of mine and I still do work for him occasionally when I am in town so he ensures I get put up here."

The casualness of his demeanor was both soothing and slightly disheartening. He had kept his back to her since climbing the stairs to his suite and seemed to have no intention of stalling his course to the bathroom as she had requested.

"I'm going to take a shower per your specifications. If you need anything there are a few things in the fridge that are always here when I arrive. I haven't had a chance to get any food or anything so it won't be lavish, but it's there if you need anything." His voice trailing as he heads into his room.

"Thanks Tai!" She raised a shaky voice to call after his retreating form which disappears around the corner of his room as she says it.

The room was silent then, and Ari didn't realize she was holding her breath until she heard the water in the shower running. Letting all the air out through her nose as her eyes went wide before she closed them tightly shut a few seconds, she tried to pull together her rattled emotions. Did she just accept his kiss because she was already so emotionally broken or did she secretly want it and had been denying herself this whole time, filling in Tai's gap with Kise without even realizing it?

Absentmindedly raising her left hand to her lips she traced the plush flesh. His kiss had been so different from Kise's. There wasn't desperation in Tai's kiss like he was trying to force her to believe he would be her everything like Kise's. Tai's kiss wanted to swallow her while showering her with all the love he was capable of giving. Pressing her bottom lip in between her teeth, she chewed it a second before shaking her head and heading towards the couch. She needed to get this over with and then try to sort it all out. Right now was all about business, though sadly her idea of business and Tai's weren't exactly lining up.

\---------------

Hot. He was so hot. Stepping into the much too cold shower, Tai let a hissed breath out through his teeth as he willed his body to regain focus. That kiss had almost sent him a little too far over the threshold of his control. He hadn't anticipated it would feel THAT GOOD to finally possess a piece of her flesh, let alone her not pull away from it like he had secretly agonized about.

As the water began soaking his hair, he raised his hands to the slightly styled locks before vigorously scrubbing his scalp as if the friction would improve his concentration; it didn't. No matter how cold the water, Tai was now enflamed by and internal fire that would never be sated. Though it wasn't much, that kiss had held within it the sparks of a flame he had only hoped she shared. To press his lips into hers only to have her not lock up forcing him to kiss the equivalent of a cardboard cutout, Tai had allowed himself to get a little carried away as his hands tried to freely roam the body he could redraw, and had many times, in his sleep.

Now as he stood in the shower naked with her in the other room, it took every ounce of control he had left not to walk out naked and consume her on the spot; the warmth of her body reigniting his own heat on multiple levels. Sadly he was painfully aware that would get him nowhere. Remaining in the shower only a few moments longer, he applied some shampoo and body wash before turning off the water, stepping out and rubbing himself with the towel vigorously before putting on a pair of tight fitting briefs.

Just because he agreed to be a gentleman didn't mean he had to make her job easy. She did need to measure him, and he knew for a fact he was larger than Kise so in a moment of childishness he indulged in the fact she would be face to face with a tangible reminder of just how inadequate that vapid blonde was.

Leaving his hair wet so the droplets of water would randomly trickle down his body, Tai walked out into the living room ready for the next step to getting the women now in his sights to fall in love with him.

\-----------------

Totally unprepared for the Adonis that walked into the room since she was still too busy setting up, Ari nearly stabbed herself in the eye with the scissors she was holding as she went to cover her mouth as it dropped open when Tai's "So you ready to do this?" Resounded close by.

"Yes of - HOLY SHIT!" escaped her lips a second before "Ow fuck!" as the scissors raked against her lower eye ridge.

"Careful!", Tai's concern causing him to rush over and take a gentle hold of her face as her hands spread out as far as they could as she tried not to stab him too. "You trying a new career as a pirate?", he teased.

Blushing and unable to say anything, Ari looked around his face in an attempt not to look into his eyes; eyes she knew she would get lost in and might make her forget why she was here. Trying to think of a witty response, she instead got a nose full of the masculine scent of his body wash mixed with the musky scent he had always carried heightening her senses and tuning her into his manliness a little too strongly. Unable to pull her eyes away from the trail they took down his well built arms before jumping to his chest as his abdomen constricted while he bent over examining her eye, Ari's breaths started coming in short, elevated intakes.

Not sure how much of his smell and close proximity she could take before she became intoxicated, Ari grabbed his wrist and hurriedly spat out the first thing that came to mind. "Band-Aid."

Sighing as if a moment had been stolen Tai smiled sadly, "Of course."

Releasing her face slowly, Tai pulls back and heads to the cabinet under the sink for a small white medical kit. Pulling it out and placing it on the counter, he removes a Band-Aid before walking it back and unwrapping it. "What a mess you are."

Not asking, not placing it overbearingly, Tai bent back over and gently slid the smallest Band-Aid he had over the small cut under her eye. Bracing as if the act was one that might kill her, Ari went rigid as Tai's face once again came close to hers.

It was a tense few moments, but when Tai gave no hint of taking advantage of the situation, Ari let out a slow breath and relaxed.

"It's just a small cut Ria. You act like one of us was trying to kill you."

At the mention of her pet name sliding so effortlessly off his lips in a teasing way, Ari's heart literally leapt in her chest. Mentally backtracking as fast as she could, she could only remember one or two times Tai had ever used that name. It wouldn't be until after he left school to go to Europe that she would be told by Kai that it was because Kise had threatened him somehow if he ever uttered his pet name for her again.

Seeing the look of shock on her face, Tai backed up and turned around to put his back towards her. "Did you want to start from the back or the front? It doesn't matter to me." His voice wasn't rushed, just genuinely curious.

"We can" -swallowing hard she continued- "start from the back. Fumbling around for her tape measure, Ari rose and walked over to stand behind the exquisitely muscled man. He was much more developed than Kise and pleasantly taller; a preference she held top on her list though had made an exception for with Kise. She had always made an exception for Kise. What a mistake. She thought to herself before wrapping the tape around Tai's waist; the closeness of their bodies something she was painfully aware of.

He didn't move the entire time from that moment on. Not when she ran her index finger down his arm as she measured the sleeve for his shirt, not when she stood in front of him and measured the breadth of the widest point of his chest as her breath barely wafted over his naked flesh pimpling it, and not when she tucked her hand into the crease of his inner thigh to measure the inseam of his pants. Truth be told she blushed a lot on that one, having accidentally grazed the edge of his testicle but not saying anything hoping the awkwardness would pass.

When his inseam was done, she paused at his foot a minute before chewing on her lip. Despite this being much the same circumstance as when she did it for Kise, the difference between this fitting and that was the feeling that the person she did it for now loved her unconditionally. Somehow that made it more nerve wracking and in certain elements more of a turn on. No matter what she tried to do to dismiss it, Aria could not deny Tai was mother fucking hot. The feel of his flesh underneath her hand, taught with controlled, unbridled strength sent tingles over her body. Unlike with Kise where she left wanting and mentally ate herself alive as she agonized over her one sided affection, all she had to do was make a move and Tai would reciprocate with a depth of passion she had reserved for her private moments when no one was around.

Caving slightly and wanting to see if this was all in her mind or a real possibility built from genuine emotions, Ari slowly slid up Tai's body before wrapping the tape measure casually around his neck. "Last measurement. Just stand still like you have been doing and this will be all over in a second." Her voice was slightly breathier and more teasing than she had intended, but the impact was more than she expected.

Wrapping his left arm around her Tai placed his hand at the small of her back and pressed her into him; his eyes locking on hers instead of staring at the wall in front of him. "Is that so. Then I guess I should help you in any way I can."

Her eyes flitting between his eyes and lips, Ari gently wrapped the tape around his neck to get the measurement for his collar. Before she released him though, she tightened it just enough to slightly cut off air flow; wondering if it would be enough to make his breath labor. When his breath came heavier, he in turn increased the pressure he held on her lower back crushing her against him.

With her breasts firmly pressed against his chest and her face inching closer and closer with each press of his hand and absentminded cinch of the tape, Ari soon found herself at the point of no return; Tai's lips breaths away.

That's when her phone vibrated and brought her back to reality. Blinking several times, she turned a bright shade of red before pulling reluctantly out of Tai's grasp; the tape releasing instantly as it slipped from his neck to dangle from her hands as she turned to hurry to see who might have saved her from a potentially irreversible mistake.

Kai

About your offer. When can we meet to set up a session? I'm ready to earn some cash and know you wont screw me over trying to get it. Just make sure they know no compromising stuff.

Hurrying through a response Ari responded back.

Ari

Let's do it tomorrow. That idiot brother of yours hasn't wanted to be within ten feet of me and I just finished Tai's measurements so he shouldn't need me for anything pressing in the days ahead.

Setting her phone down she turned around to see Tai had somehow managed to dress himself in a loose set of gym shorts and tank. Slightly saddened by the fact his perfect visage was now hidden from view, she cursed herself for her inhibitions.

"That was Kai. She needs me to meet her tomorrow at the studio. I will probably be there all day, but will begin on your order once I am done. Just text me what you need and I will make sure to apply the measurements I received today." Not looking at Tai as she moved towards to equipment to put it away she took comfort in the fact his voice was as steady and familiar as it always was when he responded.

"I'll do that. If I was to stop by would that bother you? It's been a while since I have seen you work and it might be nice to take you to lunch. I know how bad you are about eating when you are engrossed in your hobby."

Smiling effortlessly Ari looked up to meet his hesitant gaze. "That would be fine. I would like that actually." Tucking a strand of hair behind her ear she looked back down to hide her blush.

Pretending not to notice, Tai walked to the kitchen where he pours himself a drink. "Are you heading out now that we are done?"

Not looking up, Ari confirmed his suspicions, "Yes. I have a lot to do to set up Kai's request. Once I get back I have to make a few calls."

"I see. Well just know if you ever need to go off grid you can always come here. I'll make sure the receptionist knows you are allowed in." Then he walked over and reaches into his shorts pocket. "Take this. You can use it as long as I am in town. It doesn't matter if I am here or not." He then hands her a key fob for his front door.

The look she gave is full of confusion, surprise and hesitancy. "Are you sure?"

He laughs sharply. "You have always been welcome in every facet of my life. Besides, it might be nice to come home to you even if it is just when I am in town." Not letting her think about that too much Tai follows up on his response. "Now you better go. The last thing anyone needs is Kai's anger, especially regarding something she wants." Tai then leans down and kisses her on the cheek. "A Euro farewell. I'll see you tomorrow?"

Ari just nods in a daze before grabbing her stuff and heading towards the door. Pausing when she gets there, she thinks a moment and then says, "If nothing else I will see you to give you your request before you leave." Then she walks out the door and out onto a street that looks significantly different than the one she and Tai had walked down earlier. 


	14. Fuck Third Wheel It’s More Like Dual Axel

The moment Ari left Tai’s suite the emptiness of the room slammed against his conscience. Though the pounding of his heart in his ears prevented the soundlessness of the empty room from adding to the overbearing solitude that now permeated like a miasma, the loss of their shared heat was the harder sensation to adjust to.

Ever since coming back to town that first time, Tai had been unable to be satisfied with just keeping his feelings to himself. Having such overwhelming love and passion for Ari, her personality, and her creative mind, Tai had found it impossible to lock his feelings for her behind a temperature controlled mask that saturated his feelings within himself until they burst behind closed doors like an exploded sump pump; a putrid mess of deprivation, near obsession and sexual frustration.

Though at this moment he couldn’t really complain. It was those very feelings that had caused him to expend himself almost to exhaustion as he threw himself into torturous workouts in his spare time just to make it so his feelings for her didn’t have a physically coherent body to house themselves in. As a result, she had now been able to look at his body as he walked almost completely naked into the room and see the outcome of his labor.

If she hadn’t said holy fuck or given some other pleasantly astonished reaction he might have had to acknowledge that there was no chink in her obsession over Kise. Her reaction that moment and then every moment after had been more than reassuring, however.

The problem now was damning up the flow of opportunity he saw himself faced with. Standing in the middle of the entryway, staring at the door, Tai breathed in deeply once knowing the next sixteen hours without her could possibly kill him due to withdraw. He also knew the only option he had was to play the long game which meant giving her space to reflect upon what had happened but not enough that she allowed herself to be influenced in a way that was counter productive to the end result he strove for all these years.

——————

Emotional high. That was the only thing that could explain what Ari was feeling. Though not something she was new to experiencing as she had felt it several times at the beginning of her and Kise’s official working relationship, it was one she thought was long dead as years and years of unrequited love ate away at her innocent heart.

So when she arrived at her door on auto pilot, her face still blushing with a cute half smile, it took the unexpected jerk of the door opening to Kai’s harshly judgmental face and “Care to explain yourself?” for her to renter reality.

Blinking confused before looking over her shoulder and then back at Kai, Ari tried to piece together her last conscious moment with how she ended up here.

When no response came, Kai’s irritation spiked. Grabbing her friend by the arm she dragged her inside before slamming the door.

“Why don’t I start then. What the fuck were you doing with Kagami that early in the morning.” More an accusatory statement than a question.

Scrunching her eyes, Aria’s response was guarded, “He was out running and had stopped to stretch. I was supposed to see him anyway so we just went back to his place from there. I’m not understanding why you are so critical all of a sudden. Besides, why the fuck are you home?” Finally shaken back to the present, Aria brushes past Kai and heads towards her room, using her second question as more of a check yourself than one she expected an answer from. “I need to make some calls if you want to shoot tomorrow.” Then she entered her room and closed her door. 

In truth, neither Aria nor Tai had done anything worth raising red flags and on some level Kai knew that. That didn’t change her concern that Aria was now doing the same thing she had been doing; filling a void with whatever was in front of her despite that not being what she truly wanted.

Using that as the basis for her concern, Kai didn’t feel she was out of line by calling Ari up short on her behavior. She also knew, outside of bringing awareness to the situation, she didn’t have a leg to stand on; she being no better.

Still, no matter how much she hated Ryo at times, she wanted what was best for him and her best friend. That meant making sure neither got hurt figuring out this love game the three of them had been embroiled in for as long as they had been together.

Tonight wasn’t the night to pick that fight, it would just make tomorrow awkward and Kai needed the money so the best thing she felt she could do was give the girl some space. If it was still an issue tomorrow they would deal with it then.

———————

Aria wasn’t the least bit surprised that her agency was willing to free up a spot for Kai the next day around eleven. That gave her some time to make sure she was free when Tai came by as long as she got in early and did her paperwork first. She had some contracts to sign for upcoming shoots and some proposals for new designs she needed to do final drafts for anyway.

Since Kai was home odds were she either left early or didn’t go at all, calling in sick. Though it was rare for her to do either, her friends concern when Aria arrived home filled in all the blanks.

Running her thumb up and down the side of her blank phone screen, Aria played Kai’s words back through her mind. There was no love or hate between Kai and Kagami, but if she had to guess her fiery friend was just looking out for her brother, since Aria’s behavior was still directly impacting the blonde and vicariously Kai as a result.

Even so, wasn’t it time to try to let go? Maybe spending time with someone who enjoyed her wasn’t such a bad thing. It’s not like either one of them expected anything nor was Aria even actively entertaining the thought of doing anything long term with Tai since he had to go back to Europe in the end.

Maybe a little fun wouldn’t kill her. Maybe, just maybe, it would be the push that allowed her to move on.

Much like the giddiness she felt right after leaving Tai’s place, Ari found herself unable to get much sleep that night. Restless for a multitude of reasons, she tossed and turned until two when she finally got up and took a hearty dose of Melanin just to be able to fall asleep.

When she awoke the next morning she was groggy and in a bad mood. If it wasn’t for the fact Tai was going to stop by she would have seriously reconsidered scheduling the whole thing.

When was the last time she was so flustered by someone or something that she lost sleep? Sure there had been plenty of nights where she had gone to bed stressed and woken up throughout the night but male related insomnia wasn’t something that happened ever.

Groaning, she got up and got dressed before unceremoniously banging on Kai’s door. “Get up. I have to go in early but I’ll kill you if you arrive late. You have no excuse I’ll buy.”

When all she heard was a strangled groan, Ari finished pulling her life together before heading out. Kai would be there, even if she wasn’t happy about it.

From that moment on the day was busy but uneventful. Kai had agreed to be shot in three different pieces for three different men’s magazines, each providing its own financial incentive. Sure Ari’s recommendation had allowed the negotiations of Kai’s costs to easily slide into top dollar slots, but it was up to Kai to make sure she put up what Ari had put out. 

There was no way Ari could know that her concerns over Kai putting money where her mouth was would be the least of her concerns; the main being a tall, selfish, narcissistic, olive skinned male with hair the color of indigo so black only the sun caught strands showed his true color.

It was amazing how fast both Aomine and Kise could spur her mood. So when the man in question appeared on her set, there was no way she was going to allow him to make her day worse.

“Aomine.” Her tone dark enough to rival his only locks. “Why are you here?”

Having caught him completely off guard as he eye fucked Kai, who thankfully didn’t seem to have noticed him, she quickly found both his intrusive presence and the reason for his current existence in her space uncontrollably offensive; her jaw clenching as he gave his response.

“Kise is too scared to come get his own stuff.”

Raising an eyebrow as if to say ‘Oh really’ she countered with, “Since when are favors in your vocabulary?”, her indirect response letting him know she wasn’t buying it.

When no response came -not even a snarky jab- Aria turned and headed down to where Kise’s dressing room was, perfectly comfortable in her assumption that Ao would follow if he wasn’t lying or she would add yet another layer of distaste to her feelings for both him and Kise.

Once they arrived, finding Kise’s stuff was easy as his entire room was littered with items that glorified himself from magazine clippings to signed photos to merch and so on. Seeing no reason to stay and babysit a man she had a hard time seeing in a positive light, she instead hurried back to the set to ensure Kai would miss his surprise appearance entirely.

Fortunately the set was in the final stages of being broken down so Kai was nowhere to be seen. Knowing that meant she was probably changing, Aria checked her watch and smiled before heading to the front door.

She wasn’t even a whole dozen steps from

the set when Tai’s silhouette popped into view as he leaned into a pillar with his shoulder as he texted her his arrival; an act confirmed by her phone vibrating causing her to laugh prettily making the redhead look up and smile with both his lips and eyes at her.

Catching his intense stare briefly, Aria came to stand in front of him before diverting her eyes down as a blush dusted her cheeks. “I’m glad you came.”

“Is that so?” His voice filled with heightened interest laced with sheltering possessiveness as he stood up to tower over her.

“Yes, actually. I…didn’t get much sleep so today has had me in kind of a sour mood. The only thing keeping me going was the possibility of you carrying me away for an hour or so.”

“I see.” Tai’s smile growing bigger as his internal sponge began to fill with all the emotions Ari was stirring in him. “I guess that’s my big entry then.”

Before he could take her hand, Tai noticed a familiar form behind her. Looking up he gets enough of a glance to see Aomine walking off to a side door that leads out and away from the main as he waves a lazy hello.

Curious as to why Tai seemed distracted all of a sudden, Aria looks behind her to see Ao push open the door and leave .

Looking back she glowers at Tai’s chest “He was here for Kise’s stuff since he doesn’t have the balls to do it himself.” Her tone becoming dark again.

Realizing his distraction may have cost him his thoughtful gesture, Tai tries to reel in Ari’s attention before she has too long to think on things negatively.

“Guess you really do need to get out for a while. Are you ready now?”

Sighing knowingly, Aria’s shoulders dropped. “Yes, if we are just going off me being ready, but a partner shoot just finished and there are a lot of things I need to go over and give my approval on. Can I text you when I’m done? It shouldn’t take that long.”

“Of course. I’ll be close by. Just let me know when you are ready.”

“Alright, thanks. See you then.” Though it pained her, Ari knew she had to be the one to turn and leave. Kagami was too much of a gentleman to nonchalantly turn around and leave. Giving the best smile she could, she waved and then turned and left; a pleasant shudder traveling down her body as she felt Tai’s eyes never leave her until she had rounded a corner.

When Aria was out of sight, Kagami finally turned around. Expecting to busy himself in the lobby with any of the many pressing issues he was tuned into on his work phone, he was even more surprised to see Aomine walking back towards him.

“Can’t you give the girl a break?” A statement more double edged that Kagami could know seeing as he wasn’t aware Kai had been here.

“I’m not here for a girl. I’m here for a match.”

Eyebrow raised, Kagami felt the arrogant smirk pull at his lips. “Guess you are lucky I’m dressed to accommodate, though even if I wasn’t I would still be more than a match for you.”

The fierceness in Aomine’s eyes that his just behind his aloof façade was almost as intoxicating as the high he got from unexpected moments of intimacy with Aria. Not giving him a chance to respond, Kagami walked up toAomine and brushed him out of the way with a hard nudge causing the man to shuffle sideways as he passed.

Much like a gauntlet slapped across the face, the nudge signaled unspoken intent and was met with the same bravado as the challenge as Aomine clicked his tongue and followed wordlessly onto the street; the studio not being a place to resolve issues unless one wanted to deal with Aria’s wrath.


	15. Coming Up Short

I t was very uncharacteristic of Aria to sped through things at work, but being a people pleaser she had a hard t ime keeping Tai waiting long. Having breezed through the preview of Kai’s photos, seen to the repacking of all the garments and ensuring they were all shipped back to the correct locations, and taken a summary call with each magazines editor to go over final notes regarding fashion, craftsmanship and expected revenue, Ari left the office drained but feeling accomplished. 

Heading to the lobby, where she assumed Tai would be, an anxiety ridden disappointment washed over her as she realized Tai wasn’t there. Thinking maybe he had stepped out for air, Ari texted him she was ready if he was as she headed out the front doors.

Not seeing him upon exiting on any of the benches or the surrounding three foot high brick wall that lined the greenery outside, Aria couldn’t help but feel disappointment similar to when she realized things only mattered to her and not Kise.

Chastising herself for comparing the two, she walked over to the bench by the nearest tree and sat down, busying herself for a few moments by scrolling through emails.

When after fifteen minutes passed, however, Aria began to become disheartened. Looking around one last time in case she missed something, she suddenly remembered the basketball court that was nearby. Regaining hope that maybe all Tai did was walk down there to watch some kids play, Aria hustled her way over.

Not long after arriving, her mood soured as her eyes locked on Kagami restraining Aomine’s arm as the fiery man attempted to pummel Ham.

Could she not get a moment of sanity today?

Her glower must have been brutally apparent, radiating a great distance from her face as her eyes locked with Aomine’s and an irritated ‘Fuck Me’ seemed to ghost across his features. Despite it’s perceived intensity, the men remained locked in their restrained assault until Aria stepped onto the court and voiced her opinion; anger brewing behind her eyes at the sheer masculine stupidity playing out in front of her.

Of course it was stupid. It had to be. Aomine and Ham were involved, not to mention the smug look on Ham’s face which suggested he had said one, if not many, things that involved that which should not be named or alluded to; most likely why Tai was restraining the more relevant one. The whole thing was irritating and made her mad and the more she thought about it the more her irritation over the current situation merged with her confusion over Tai’s disappearance, Kise’s blatant rejection of her while he maintained his fantasy obsession, and the pain her best friend was going through that none of them could escape.

Suddenly feeling overwhelmingly angry and over it all, Aria snapped. “For once in your god forsaken life Ham could you not stick your dick where it doesn’t belong and it’s not wanted. You tarnish everything you touch just by existing and the filth that embodies your personality can’t be washed off.” Her steps were purposeful, her glaring eyes locked on the only thing open to her that she could take her insecurity and anger out on despite not really acknowledging she was doing it or how angry she was.

The shock that brought everyone’s attention on her was both overpowering and electrifying as numerous sets of wide and confused eyes locked on her. Knowing this was a moment she needed to capitalize on before her words set in while not particularly caring how offensive her words were, she barreled forward.

“And you, Aomine, seem to have a lot you need to explain and I expect you to do it with the common decency I would expect someone known for his arrogance and selfishness to have acquired being a world traveler since clearly you didn’t gain any manners here.”

That’s when Ham, who had been just about to rip Aria a new one now that her words had registered, made the mistake of laughing.

No one, even Aria herself, knew she could move that fast or be that bold when she, in a burst of anger, strode up to Ham and slapped him full palm across the face.

“I don’t care if it’s your fault or not, but you are the LAST person to show disdain for anyone’s behavior. You are a disgrace and one I never should h e allowed near someone I love. You disgust me.” Without even caring how that impacted him, Aria turned towards the other two men and reached up so one hand grabbed Aomine’s ear while the other grabbed Tai’s.

“You two come with me.” Then she yanked them hard enough to elicit a curse and a ‘Fucking hell’ from Aomine while Tai just sucked in a sharp breath and did his best not to anger her further before pulling them in front of her so they all marched chaperoned off the court.

In hindsight the whole scene would feel very surreal and be something Aria would remain embarrassed about for quite some time, though it would only be brought up teasingly by Tai behind locked doors with a much more intimate vibe going forward. Now, however, the anger held within this moment would fuel her to lead them to Café Noir near the mall where she would appease it with the sweetness of its desert; a vain attempt to force feed some sweetness back into her personality.

Though not necessarily willing, Aomine managed to hold his tongue the entire way there since at this moment one woman close to his awareness slapping him was quite enough and feeling that contact from Aria would just bring back memories of that night with Kai that he already just relived when he attempted to restructure that blonde headed pricks face.

Entering the café Aria brushed beside them and found an open circular booth at the back of the seating area. Motioning sternly does the men to sit down, she watched until they were situated before claiming the seat nearest the door, effectively allowing her to block any escape on Aomine’s part.

For several moments there was silence as Aria glanced at the menu, Tai stared at his interlaced hands above the table and Aomine glared at the exit; his chin resting on his upturned palm.

When the waitress came and asked if anyone would like to order, the men looked at Aria horrified as her normally pleasant persona greeted the woman as she ordered only to vanish when she left and the brunt of her anger locked back in both of them.

“Since I imagine most of that seems to have played out in the court is Aomine’s fault, why don’t we start there. Tai and I have other things to discuss that aren’t relevant to this conversation anyway so depending on the answers he gives to my questions he can be free to leave.”

Lazily turning his eyes on her, Aomine did his best to hide his irritation at what seemed like Aria’s unnecessary persecution on him. “I don’t see why the hell I have to answer to you.”

Dangling on the precipice of her last nerve, Aria’s voice became strained and soft. “You are correct you don’t have to. But if you ever even flirted with the idea of rectifying with Kai, I would suggest you not make an enemy out of me.”

Aomine could tell by the glint in her eye she meant business. It was very similar to the one Kise gave on the court when he was finally ready to commit and not just show off. Still, not enjoying the idea of ceding to her, he held her gaze until the tension became palpable.

“Fine, since the drama of one woman hating me is more than I care to deal with I’ll play along . What do you want to know?”

Sitting up with a look that showed how guarded she as she crossed her arms over her chest and her eyes creased slightly at the corners, Aria sat back and asked what was on her mind.

“Why the fuck are you here?” 


	16. Insomnia

Nights like this with Kai were rare but provided a strange equilibrium of desperation and devotion that hurdled friendship and romance in unnatural ways.

As Kai drank, Ari listened; providing insight every time the smaller female’s lacerated heart stopped to bleed so Aria could take up the blade and reopen the very same wound that had healed on her own heart during their moment of silence. An estranged set of Romeo and Juliet lovers -one more Mercurio while the other the Shrew from Taming of the Shrew- if ever there were.

When Aria finished, the two existed in silence as the liquid pendulum in front of Kai marked both time and depth as it measured the worth of the emotions she could no longer handle healthily; choosing to drown them in its sap colored hue until the dark sea that was her soul swallowed them into forgetfulness.

It wasn’t so much that either wanted to forget. It was more like the two didn’t want to focus on the memories that validated the answer to Kai’s question ‘How did we end up like this’.

Aria’s response had been so poignant without a smear of cynical self loathing. “ We’re trying to flee and to stay at the same time; and we hate ourselves because the pain we feel should be enough to drive us away, and yet we refuse to do that. We still hope things will be different this time.” The words were such a sickening truth that actually saying them made Aria feel like she had vomited for hours leaving nothing left to do but dry heave. 

Yet their impact was clear as Kai quickly changed the subject in much the same way she changed drinks or men; brushing the unwanted one aside for something the same as what she had pushed aside yet different in its model. Except this model looked a lot like the shoe on the other foot named Kagami.

Having no real concrete response to Kai’s testing of her friend’s romantic waters, Aria verbally shrugged it off with “Well, we are friends” despite knowing damn well the walls that separated friends and something else were growing thinner and thinner.

Not wishing elaborate questioning, Aria threw out one last Indesputable platitude. “If something makes you happy, grab it and make it yours. If it’s just filling a void, it will feel like happiness but will only hurt you both in the end”; both a statement and a word of advice that neither could ignore nor felt like embellishing on. As a result, it hung between them until Kai finally gave a closed lip sigh and smiled sadly.

There was no way around it. Though on the same path, the two had to find their own raft or drown and no measure of verbal bouis could keep them afloat.

Shortly after, Kai turned and headed to her room while Ari grabbed her bag and headed out the door.

———————

The soft click of the old style trunk locks swung open against the leather edge of the storage trunk Ari used to transport Kise’s orders to him as she knelt down to peek inside; a reassuring pain clenching her chest as the familiar disappointment of never being able to undress him as he wore the very things she created with such love just for him.

Knowing she wouldn’t be able to sleep, Aria had gone to the shop in an attempt to both escape the present and wallow in the past. Since running into Kai back home she had been assaulted with images of both Tai and Kise. Unable to escape them by sketching new designs or reading, she went to the only place that might give her a semblance of peace.

Having finished Kise’s latest order before things with Tai had gotten more complex, and still being angry with Kise, she had neglected to tell him they were ready, a fact that only dug in her skin deeper as he didn’t have the balls to check on it’s status.

Now, however, she was grateful in a very unhealthy way they had never made their way to their rightful owner. Tilting back the lid, a soft metal on leather creak coming from the hinges, Aria took in the slightly feminine musk of the one man she seemed desperate to rewrite or erase on an emotional level. Much lighter than the thick and overbearing manly scent Tai gave off, Kise’s scent bore hints of CK calogne.

Reaching in with a surprisingly loving but sad smile, Aria gently gathered the crisp button down that lay folded neatly on the top in her delicate fingers. Made from a bamboo blend to ensure they remained soft, they were great for giving the impression of prep while remaining functional.

Bringing the fabric to her nose, Aria closed her eyes and breathed in deeply, allowing the scent to slowly saturate every membrane and poor as it traveled towards her brain.

There was no way she could be unaffected by the smell as each breath in created memories of times where she had shared intimate moments on and off set that had clearly meant something to her and her alone.

Digging her fingers into the fabric, as if crushing it would also crush him from her life. Aria felt tears begin to well in her eyes. She had to stop this. She couldn’t continue to allow him to control this much of her emotional state. She also had to stop holding out for the day he would wake up and see that he was everything to her and she deserved the same.

Sniffling as she bit her lip hard enough to force back the tears, Aria rose. Tomorrow she told herself. Tomorrow she would give up. Tonight she would have one last night of delusion before her innocence was ripped away.

Having dressed sloppily, it was easy to remove her loose fitting pants and T-shirt, discarding then in a pile on the floor before reaching down and picking up the long sleeve button down. Groaning inwardly, Ari began unfastening the top three buttons as she stood in the back room of her shop naked.

As each button came undone, Aria’s mind wandered as it spun one of thousands of secret fantasies where she put on Kise’s clothes before bed or after sex; a moment of intimacy long abolished.

When the last button came undone, Aria let the fabric slip through her fingers until she was holding the bottom seams between her fingers. Slipping first in and through with first one arm then the other, her body penetrated the fabric which was only a few sizes bigger than her own measurements. Wanting to indulge her senses further, Aria walked towards the mirror to admire her craftsmanship of both the fabric and the illusions in her mind before turning and heading to bed; her own words haunting her faintly as she slid between the covers.

“If something makes you happy, grab it and make it yours. If it’s just filling a void, it will feel like happiness but will only hurt you in the end.”

And hurt it would, but with pain comes awareness. Sadly most epiphanies exist after the conclusion of events. So what door would open after the first one closed?


End file.
